"I need your ideas," says Rick Scott, the governor-elect of Florida, inthis new YouTube video
posted November 17. "We gotta make this the model state. We gotta make this the state that we're the most effective, the best state to do business, the best state for all Floridians. And that's what I'm gonna do. But I can only do it with your help. We've got a website, ScottTransition.com... Get on, give us all your ideas. We're gonna make this the number-one state in the country."
That's right, folks: Scott is gonna straighten up the state, get us sane and solvent, and he's gonna do it with your ideas. We're certainly gonna send some. Chief among them are:
4. Get a Refund From Bill McCollum
It's well and good that Scott beat McCollum like a gong, but it's not quite enough. It'll be a long time before Floridians forget that McCollum, in a fit of religious idealism and fiscal stupidity, paid discredited antigay activist George Alan Rekers $160,000 to testify on two occasions against gay adoptions in Florida. He did this over the objections of the Department of Children and Families as well as those of his own legal team. McCollum was a maverick that way. We want our money back.
3. Split Florida Into Two States
It was a good idea when the City Commission of North Lauderdale proposed it 2008, and it's a better idea now. North and South Florida don't agree on anything. Culture (redneck/NYawk), spending priorities (war/welfare), ethnicity (cracker/Latino), religion (protestant/Jewish-Catholic), social policies (lynchings/gay marriage), economic philosophies (anarcho-libertarian/moderate), positions vis a vis racial equality (kill the darkies/we are the darkies).
We sure as hell don't vote for the same people. By partitioning the state, Scott could improve his own victory margin in the next campaign and leave us to be governed by somebody without, you know, a record of swindling Medicaid.
2. Close Pill Mills and Legalize Weed
If Rick Scott means to help Florida's industries, as he so plainly intends, that can only be good news for SoFla's infamous pill mills, which together constitute the headwaters of a deadly river of narcotics, flowing north to Ohio, Kentucky, and West Virginia. The prescription-drug trade is a billion-dollar industry in Florida, and if the state does the right thing and kills it, it'll seriously hurt us. Unless we turn the pill mills into marijuana dispensaries.
1. For Goodness Sake, Stop Changing the Definitions of Words
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If Rick Scott is serious about turning Florida into a "model state," he would do well to take a few moments to reflect upon the language usage at ScottTransition.com. Seldom will you ever see a website so in love with the word accountability. Scott means for his governorship to be accountable, accountable, accountable. Well, the gubernatorial campaign may be over, but we've got long memories. We know what accountability looks like, and it ain't Rick Scott.