Rick Scott Wants Your Money to Continue His Dumb Voter-Purge Crusade
Rick Scott, who got back on the voter-purge horse last week in order to weed out the
hundreds of thousands 198 people who would totally compromise elections, is now asking for donations to help his cause.
In a letter signed by Scott, Gov. McCreepyFace says the effort that once questioned the citizenship of as many as 180,000 registered voters ain't about politics. Never you mind that the only case of voter fraud comes from the GOPers and that this whole thing is based on trying to suppress minorities from getting out to vote in November.
Nope. No politics here. As you were. Also, Barack Obama sucks. Gimme yer money!
"You see," Scott's letter beings, "unlike President Obama's allies, I don't view the world through a partisan lens. I'm appalled that so many Democrats have stepped up to defend the right of non-citizens to cast ballots in Florida. I'm equally appalled that neither Crist nor the Democrats have stepped up to defend the right of millions of legal Florida voters to cast ballots."
Unlike Obama's friends, we don't play politics here. I'm totally nonpartisan. Also, I am APPALLED that Obama and Charlie Crist and Bill Nelson don't agree with me on this issue! I am equally APPALLED that they want noncitizens to vote. That's the only logical conclusion one can make to the blow-back I'm getting from this frivolous crusade. You know who else wanted noncitizens to vote? HITLER. Also, if you could donate $25 to $1,000 or more to the Republican Party of Florida, that would be fantastic!
Voldemort's letter is soaked in the feigned commitment to electoral integrity. It's all about keeping things hunky-dory, man.
Scott has gone after this voter-purge thing like your dog trying to hump the coffee table. Yet the numbers of noncitizens registered to vote don't justify his rabid lust to suppress voters -- particularly those in the Hispanic and black communities, should Rick get his way.
And yet, GOPer voter fraud runs rampant.
HA. HA. *shrugs*
And, according to the Florida Department of Law Enforcement, 178 cases of alleged voter fraud have been referred to the department since 2000. Which, according to Ion Sancho, election supervisor in Leon County, Floridians have a better chance of getting struck by lightning than committing voter fraud.
So. Now that we got those silly facts out of the way, won't you open your checkbook and donate to Republican Party of Florida?
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you'll never miss New Times Broward-Palm Beach's biggest stories.