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Tom Truex Is Your New Broward GOP Leader

Tom Truex was chosen to lead the GOP into a brighter future by not changing anything they do whatsoever.
Tom Truex was chosen to lead the GOP into a brighter future by not changing anything they do whatsoever.

After a short-lived term as Broward Republican chairman came to a close for Rico Petrocelli because he didn't get along with people, or some such thing, the Broward GOP had a chance to really come out swinging, especially after getting slammed in the November elections, and choose a new leader who doesn't embrace the hard-line social conservative standards that have made them so lovable to the rest of the country.

Then they went and chose a dude with hard-line social conservative standards that have made them so lovable to the rest of the country.

And so, Tom Truex is your new Broward GOP huckleberry.

Aside from looking like a Lexus car dealer salesman, Truex is a former Davie mayor and member of the Davie Town Council. He comes into the new job  -- as he puts it -- "battle tested" and "experienced as a past elected official."

Battle tested, as in, he voted for stuff a bunch of times and probably made speeches at little league opening days in Davie.

"The perception of the Republican Party isn't that great," Truex said in a speech after accepting the gig, proving that he's not just a terrific speaker but pretty good at delivering pitch-perfect understatements.

So what's on the résumé of the dude who's gonna help change the perception of the Republican Party?

Well, for starters, The Beard made his bones as chairman of Hope Pregnancy Centers, which is a group that "discourages abortions."

He also once took a stance against those evil United Way people when they decided to cut funding to the Boy Scouts because of their ban on gay members and leaders and because they also funded Planned Parenthood, which is the opposite of Hope Pregnancy Center.

But the answer, according to Truex, is that the Republicans have been doing so many silly things.

"The way to improve the reputation of the Broward Republican Executive Committee isn't to hide silly things we do," he said, "but to stop doing so many silly things."

We need to be public about the way we hate gay people!

However, Truex did say he would allow the media to attend all party meetings, so that's a plus. We look forward to attending with our notepad in hand and fart-making party favor in pocket.

Truex is coming in to help lead the party roll into 2014 ready to rock when Rick Scott will be up for reelection and people will be coming out to the polls to remind the GOPers of how lovable they are. He's also come in to whip the party into shape after Florida went to Barack Obama for the second time in a tow, and Broward Sheriff Al Lamberti was given the boot on Election Day.

So to recap: The Florida GOPz got their asses handed to them at the polls mainly because of their stance on social issues and so hired a dude that is anti-abortion and dislikes The Gays.

Good job, good effort, GOPers!

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