Everything that makes South Florida the Vice capital of the country--the drugs, the sex, the gambling--is amplified during the week of the Super Bowl. But nothing ruins the perfect party week like someone dying or going to jail. So this week we'll be presenting The Juice Vice Guide to South Florida. We've done the arduous research, taken the dangerous journeys, and interviewed dozens of local experts to bring you the definitive handbook to depravity in the Sunshine State.
After the jump, how to know if your prostitute is actually a police officer.
Plenty of cops will be conducting prostitution rings this week. Sadly, short of witnessing her have sex with your friend, there's no sure-fire way of knowing the prostitute you're trying to patronize is not an undercover cop. So we spoke with a few local prostitutes, both male and female, and put together some tips to help make your exchange of money for sex in South Florida a little less awkward. Here are some clues that your would-be hookeraa could be a cop:
She's in a rush.
"Working girls want your money, simple as that," says an escort we'll call Amber. "They'll take the time if they think it'll pay off in the end." Police officers posing as decoys want to arrest as many people as possible that night and don't want to have a conversation longer than one minute with any of them.
She looks too good.
Police want to attract as many men as possible, so they aren't going to use an unattractive decoy. If she seems out of place strolling along Biscayne Boulevard or sitting in a shabby motel room, you might be looking at five-o.
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SHOW ME HOW
She doesn't do drugs.
If the person you're feeling out is unwilling to partake in whatever mild drugs you might offer, there's a decent chance he or she is a police officer. The good news is that you know. The bad news is that you just offered drugs to a cop.
She mentions money.
Prostitutes generally call the cash being exchanged a "donation," often referring to the dollar amount in "roses" or "kisses." If she seems quick to talk about money, mosey on out of there, cowboy.
She won't get naked.
Police officers won't want to take off their clothes for you. A prostitute who believes it will lead to a sale probably will. Also, it's not illegal to ask someone to pose for naked photos.
She says she's not a cop.
Just remember, there's no law that says police officers can't lie to you.