When you celebrate a birthday, your friends buy you a Hallmark card and make fun of you for being old and then take you out for drinks.
But when rich people celebrate a birthday, their friends name a whole street after them.
Business magnate; Waste Management and Blockbuster founder; onetime owner of the Florida Marlins, the Florida Panthers, and the Miami Dolphins; and all-around super-rich guy H. Wayne Huizenga is having SE Ninth Street between Federal Highway and Cordova Road named after him as a gift for his 75th birthday.
His birthday is on December 29.
Huizenga's good buddy, lobbyist James Blosser, is paying $300 for each sign to be installed.
On Tuesday, city commissioners agreed to eliminate El Vedado Drive and change the secondary name to Wayne Huizenga Boulevard.
Ninth Street will remain the primary designation, so people who live in the area won't get their addresses all screwed up and changed.
The Rio Vista Civic Association provided a letter saying it wasn't opposed to the name change.
Blosser picked a road in the Rio Vista neighborhood, where Huizenga lives, because it was really the perfect gift. And probably because Huizenga already has gold-plated hovercrafts in every color, so a street would have to do.
"I thought it was a small token of appreciation for what he's done," Blosser said. "He drives that street every day."
Yep, that coffee mug your coworkers pitched in for with a picture of comic-strip character Cathy looking tired and exclaiming, "ACK!" looks even shittier now than it originally did.