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Best Musical

Song of the Living Dead

For the third year in a row, the Promethean Theatre made the summertime fun, funny, and pleasantly disgusting by mounting a musical grounded in cult cinema. Song of the Living Dead was arguably the most accomplished of them all, a pop-savvy, self-deprecating, and surprisingly sophisticated satire. Margaret Ledford directed the action with loopy abandon and excess energy, and the choreography and musical direction expressed the kind of talent and polish usually reserved for Broadway-level works. Indeed, Song of the Living Dead worked as flawlessly as it did only because of the commitment of everyone involved, from the artistic director to the live band, the first and only in the Promethean's history. The cast approached this ridiculous, South Parkian satire like it was Les Miserables, with Clay Cartland and Noah Levine turning the most heads. The question is, with the Promethean closing this year, what other company will take on shows with "splash zones"?

Best Theater Season

Caldwell Theatre

The Caldwell Theatre may be South Florida's oldest theater company still in operation, but there was a time when it didn't have the esteem of the county's dramatic powerhouses, Mosaic and Dramaworks. In the mid- to late '00s, the theater's forte seemed to be conventional, familiar audience pleasers rather than provocative think pieces — a pair of Steel Magnolias for every Doubt. This is no longer the case, particularly since Clive Cholerton took over the reins as artistic director. After a bumpy first season beset with actor injuries and less-than-stellar selections, Cholerton turned the Caldwell into a regular hit factory in 2011 and 2012. It offered hip and thoughtful shows like the fact-based hoarding dramedy Stuff, the American postwar panorama Six Years, the political domestic drama After the Revolution, the satiric pro-wrestling comedy The Elaborate Entrance of Chad Deity, and the of-the-moment and pro-labor musical Working. The fact that the Caldwell is heading toward bankruptcy protection from unpaid loans at the height of its artistic success is a tragic irony.

Best Festival Returned From the Dead

Fort Lauderdale Air & Sea Show

Where else can you find the Air Force Thunderbirds, the Navy Hornets, the Coast Guard search-and-rescue team, and the Navy SEALs parachute team all gathered in one place? While liberals might dismiss this as a showy recruiting tool, a fossil-fuel-powered display of machismo, or an I-don't-wanna-know-how-costly waste of taxpayer dollars, the Fort Lauderdale Air & Sea Show is quite a mind-blowing spectacle. After a five-year hiatus, it returned in April. Throw in a lot of CGI effects and a little bit of plot and you've got yourself a blockbuster.

Best Nightlife Party

Flaunt at Respectable Street

Flaunt is one of South Florida's longest-running dance parties. Housed in West Palm Beach's Respectable Street, Flaunt is the dance floor to hit to let loose, down a whole lot of booze, and forget about all your cares. The DJs spin the best of electro-dance and new wave, the bartenders serve heavy shots, and the crowd ain't so bad-looking either.

Best Place to Meet Single Hipsters

Green Room

You've got on tight pants, and so does he. You're drinking PBR, and so is she. You both share a few flirty smiles on the dance floor as you booty-dance ironically to the "Tootsie Roll." It's hipster love at first sight. This type of love connection can occur only underneath the glittering chandelier at the Green Room at one of its various hipster dance nights during the week. Week after week, the too-cool-for-school 20-something crowd flocks to the dance floor at the Green Room to shake its hips to MGMT, the Faint, and Notorious B.I.G. — ironically, of course. Whether it's a Thursday night or Saturday night, the Green Room is the place to meet your fixed-gear bike-riding, PBR-drinking, tattooed dream lover.

Best Dance Club

Round Up Country Western Club

Located out in our version of the west, in Davie, just off of State Road 84, Round Up offers South Florida country lovers a big ol' break from the bustle of electronic and booty music and a place to line up and show off their slick moves. You'll find gunslingers in cowboy boots and country girls in daisy dukes. Round Up's huge dance floor accommodates the regular twinkle toes and newcomers looking for a rollicking party. There's also a number of big-name country-friendly acts that stop through to perform, like Uncle Kracker. Come on; where else can you get bottle service and dance lessons all while dressed like John Wayne?

Best Club DJs

Mig and Sweetswirl of Green Room

Each week at Digital Love Thursdays, the fashion-savvy indie dance crowd bounced, grinned, and threw back PBRs as DJs Mig and Sweetswirl served up just the right jams. Mixing tracks freshly picked out of the blogosphere with old-school classics, Mig and Sweetswirl never ceased to give the room the beat it needs: When it was time for a sing-along, a Smiths tune inevitably took over the room. When it was time for something new, a track from a local artist made its way into the mix. Always exciting and with a great feel for the room, the DJ duo were the right folks to have at the helm of the party. With Digital Love recently deceased, Mig and Sweetswirl's skills will now be lent to helping the booties shake on Saturday nights at Green Room instead.

Best One-Nighter

Brown Bag Wednesdays

The Green Room has taken downtown Fort Lauderdale and slapped it upside the head with good music and a helluva lotta dancing. The rise of hip-hop haven Brown Bag Wednesdays sweetens the tragic loss of the once-popular dance party Digital Love at the same spot. Sweetens it with quarts of Colt 45 and impromptu dance-offs. Not only do Brown Bag Wednesdays bring the malt liquor; they bring cozies that resemble brown bags. How's that for almost authentic? Kicking off this one-nighter — one that's demonstrated that it is constant with quality — was a DJ set and a bit of an off-the-cuff live performance by Talib Kweli. The night brings together the brightest rhymers from the tricounty area and some national acts like Dead Prez. For those who claim there's no hip-hop scene in South Florida, Brown Bag is taking you out to lunch and feeding you the delicious truth. We've got it, and we've got it good.

Best Strip Club

Scarlett's Cabaret

As the night winds down and the bars close, you're still drunk, you haven't blown all your cash, and you kind of wanna see some titties. Where do you go? You grab your thick-rimmed-glasses-wearing girlfriend and drag your tatted-up ass over to Scarlett's. Duh. Scarlett's not only has nude ladies dancing away way early into the morning but also free lunch. Sure, you're thinking, eating in a strip club is icky, but didn't you catch the part that it's free? The dancers are all nude, and you can even score a two-for-one dance. It's a couples-friendly joint, not high class but not sleazy, so maybe you get a dance for the lady friend too. No? The girls here are chill, so you don't feel pressured to let it rain your entire income on their nude booties. Just sit back, grab a glass of booze, and enjoy the show.

Best Pub Quiz

Slackers Bar & Grill

Throw out everything you knew about pub quizzes and bands of cardiganed hipsters competing rabidly to nail a question on a technicality. In fact, don't call this light-beer-fueled questionfest a "pub quiz" at all. It's Trivia Night, plain and simple, and it goes down every Wednesday at 8 p.m. Your down-to-earth and occasionally lewd hosts, Dawn and Ken, holler out questions between loud plays of all the crappy songs you love. Be warned, though, that when the stakes get high, she'll trick you: "Uganda... is not the correct answer!" As for the bar, it's smoker-friendly (so bring your disgusting friends along), and the burgers and wings are decent. It's a sports bar owned by Packers fans, and it's full of TVs, so you just might decide to stick around to watch a game (or, as happened this year, one of the Trivia Night regulars competing on Jeopardy).

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