Schoolgirls Gone Wild

“You take the good. You take the bad. You take them both. And there you have the facts of life.” If you grew up in the ’80s, you can probably sing the lyrics to the sitcom in your sleep. Well, hold on to your seats, because the sweet schoolgirls of...

By Rebecca McBane

June 27, 2013

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“You take the good. You take the bad. You take them both. And there you have the facts of life.” If you grew up in the ’80s, you can probably sing the lyrics to the sitcom in your sleep. Well, hold on to your seats, because the sweet schoolgirls of Eastland — Blair, Jo, Tootie, and Natalie — are taking good and bad to a whole new level in The Facts of Life: The Lost Episode, now playing at the Empire Stage in Fort Lauderdale. Inspired by the ’80s sitcom, Jamie Morris, writer of Mommie Queerest, The Silence of the Clams, and Re-Designing Women, brings the raunchiest show in his repertoire to the stage. Leave the children at home for this one, because dildos, prostitution, and lesbian sex are just a few of the plot lines that mark this as an adults-only show. Don’t miss this side-splitting spoof Thursday through August 4 on the Empire Stage, located at 1140 N. Flagler Drive. Showtimes are Thursdays through Saturdays at 8 p.m. and Sundays at 5 p.m. Tickets cost $30. Call 954-678-1496, or visit empirestage.com.
Thursdays-Saturdays, 8 p.m.; Sundays, 5 p.m. Starts: June 27. Continues through Aug. 4, 2013

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Rebecca McBane is the arts and culture/food editor for New Times Broward-Palm Beach. She began her journalism career at the Sun Sentinel's community newspaper offshoot, Forum Publishing Group, where she worked as the editorial assistant and wrote monthly features as well as the weekly library and literature column, "Shelf Life." After a brief stint bumming around London's East End (for no conceivable reason, according to her poor mother), she returned to real life and South Florida to start at New Times as the editorial assistant in 2009. A native Floridian, Rebecca avoids the sun and beach at all costs and can most often be found in a well-air-conditioned space with the glow of a laptop on her face.

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