10 Lip-Sync Fails More Entertaining Than Beyoncé's Inaugural Vocal Pantomime

When we were kids, we didn't have the Internet. We had to keep ourselves entertained the old fashioned way: arson, black magic and -- our favorite -- lip-syncing. Every day after school, we rushed home, popped in the City of Angels soundtrack and pretend we were Nicholas Cage, as we swayed dramatically...

By Matt Preira

January 23, 2013

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When we were kids, we didn't have the Internet. We had to keep ourselves entertained the old fashioned way: arson, black magic and -- our favorite -- lip-syncing.

Every day after school, we rushed home, popped in the City of Angels soundtrack and pretend we were Nicholas Cage, as we swayed dramatically and pantomimed the lyrics to the Goo Goo Dolls' "Iris."

So we're not entirely sure why everyone is making such a goddamn fuss about Beyoncé falling back on a safety net at Monday's presidential inauguration.

If anything, we can think of at least ten instances of obviously-fake singing that are significantly more embarrassing, scandalous and, most importantly, entertaining.

10. Ashley Tisdale

We have ranked the above pop-starlet at the bottom of our list because, well, who the fuck is Ashley Tisdale?

9. Mariah Carey

If you type "Mariah Carey" and "lip sync" into YouTube, you could blow an entire Tuesday night watching every single embarrassing clip. Not that we did. OK, fine, we did. Twice.

8. Lady Gaga

Hey as far as we're concerned, if Lady Gaga keeps wearing lunch meat and putting on concerts that cross drag shows with Jazzercise and Cirque Du Soleil, she's allowed to phone in the vox as long as she needs to.

7. Lindsay Lohan

Renaissance woman, Lindsay Lohan, on the other hand, should never be allowed to live the above clip down. Or her chronic drunk driving, for that matter.

6. Jennifer Hudson

Some people (on the Internet) say Jennifer Hudson's performance of the National Anthem at Super Bowl 2009 rivaled Whitney Houston's legendary rendition from 1991. And by that, they mean both ladies know how to pretend they're singing real good.

5. Ashlee Simpson

Jessica's younger, significantly less successful sibling, was not content to simply completely fuck up her SNL debut. She also deemed it necessary to bust out a leprechaun jig as the cherry on top.

4. Freddie Mercury

We love Freddie for his balls. So ballsy!

3. Kurt Cobain

But when it comes to rebellious anti-lip-syncing, its Nirvana's frontman whose testicles are surely afflicted with elephantiasis.

2. Milli Vanilli

The crux of Vanilli-gate was that concertgoers were somehow still naive and/or downright stupid enough to not even begin to suspect that live performers have backup tracks. Milli was not the worst. They were just the first.

1. X-Factor

Generally speaking, we get it. Concerts -- especially the arena-sized spectacles of the Top 40 continuum -- are about putting on a show. What does it matter if the vocals are prerecorded if the delivery is on? However, we can't say the same rules apply for a reality show whose primary function is a singing contest.

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