Big Elvis to Shake Up Suspicious Minds at Coconut Creek Casino, Aug. 19
I can't even describe the feeling of simpatico brotherliness I felt whilst gazing at the cover of Rolling Stone a few days ago and seeing the moobtastic "large and in charge" photograph of our very own Rick Ross gracing the cover, all tacked up and topless for everyone to savor.
As an obese person myself, who's suffered the skinny-centric foils of society for three decades, this was a crowning point in something I've always known: Fat is beautiful. But it's been a long way to the top for us pudgers, and we must not forget those who have come before us.
Enjoy a few of our favorite "big boys" of the music industry after the jump.
6. P.M. Dawn - "Reality Used to be a Friend of Mine"
The Cordes brothers burst into the hip-hop/R&B scene back in the late '80s, early '90s, and it immediately stood out just how smooth Prince Be could be behind a microphone. With a repertoire featuring mostly introspective lyrics of lost loves, Prince's woes were a shoe-in for anybody who'd ever felt dejected and forlorn. This leads us to ask, are fat dudes the last true poets?
5. Heavy D & the Boyz - "Now That We Found Love"
Dwight Myers, AKA Heavy D's death last year on November 8 was a tragic blow to hip-hop and music in general. Always a larger-than-life persona, spouting positivity and good times. He will always represent a great era in hip-hop.
4. Sir Mix-A-Lot - "Baby Got Back"
You could make an argument that Anthony Ray, better known as Sir Mix-A-Lot hasn't been too relevant in the last decade or so (2003's Daddy's Home failed to stir interest) but you could also make a case that any time the song above comes on, everybody's shaking their ass. Sometimes it takes a large dude to point out to the masses just how good a large thing is.
3. Fats Domino - "Blueberry Hill"
Antoine "Fats" Domino is undoubtedly the original large man of music. Never one to shy from his circumference, he could've gone cheeky and dubbed himself "Slim" or "Rail Pike" but he never did. Look at the video. See all the screaming chicks waving their panties? That's the power of Fats.
2. Poison Idea - "Punish Me"
I wanted to throw a curveball here with a bunch of white dudes but found that John Popper's fluctuating weight in complete denial of his true largesse appeal would've been too easy.
So, I present every lineup of Portland's Poison Idea as an example. This is a band that, at one point in time, came in at a collective 1,300 lbs. Mostly from the never-ending consumption habits of singer Jerry A and guitar virtuoso Tom "Pig Champion" Roberts. Roberts passed away on January 31 of 2006, and his influence on punk, hard rock, and grunge is still experienced today.
1. The Eat - "Mary Mary"
I can't fully do one of these things if I don't throw some locals in. The above footage is from The Eat's amazing reunion show back on September 21, 1996. Watching drummer Chris Cottie, "The Monster of the Midway," hold these guys down was the best birthday gift I could have received. Although he sadly passed away on June 6, 2004, Cottie left behind a recorded legacy with The Eat, the Drug Czars, and an infamous tour with David Allan Coe. Pick up their Alternative Tentacles discography. It fucking rules.
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