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Power Rank Friday: Jah Jams, Overstuffed Government Contracts, and Helmetless Dolphins

The local personalities, egos, and public figures who swung through the news cycle this week, ranked by New Times' crack research department using a highly scientific algorithm (i.e., burning stacks of old Broward phone books and reading the ashes).5. Hollywood 104.7 FM "The Jam." Hollywood Police have been busy trying...
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The local personalities, egos, and public figures who swung through the news cycle this week, ranked by New Times' crack research department using a highly scientific algorithm (i.e., burning stacks of old Broward phone books and reading the ashes).

5. Hollywood 104.7 FM "The Jam." Hollywood Police have been busy trying to crack a case literally in its own backyard: The department's parking lot was a dead zone for keyless entry and starters on cars. Turns out, a bootleg radio station pumping tunes from a nearby roof was jamming up the appropriate frequency. The playlist? Caribbean music, 24/7.
 
4. Department of Juvenile Justice's Wansley Walters. Usually Florida officials have blinders on when it comes to private contractors fleecing wallet-busting paydays from government work. But after the state discovered that a foundation working with at-risk kids pays its executive a $1.2 million annual salary, South Florida's native Walters has come down hard. Whether it's just the usual pol noise or actual outrage remains to be seen.  
 
3. LeBron James. Er... this is true... as soul-crushing as it is to say it... 

2. SeaWorld. When the Florida staple isn't, you know,
feeding young children to wild beasts, the water park rakes in a pretty
profit -- rare for amusement parks in the Recession Age. So much so that the company is going public. Blackstone Group LP, the private equity outfit holding the paper on the chain, announced a $100 million IPO this week.    

1. Dolphins' CEO Mike Dee. Really, what's a better way to distract a fan base souring fast from years of blah play and noncontention? Simple. Leak an ugly new team logo, thereby pulling the angry debate off the field and onto less important matters. Reggie Bush? How can you talk about Reggie Bush at a time like this? There's no helmet on that new damned dolphin.



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