Westboro Baptist Weirdos a No-Show; That Would Make Fred Phelps a Flaming Liar

The creeps from the Westboro Baptist "Church" didn't show up at the funeral for 24-year-old U.S. Army Spc. Jordan Christopher Schumann in Fort Pierce last night, which is good news for the rest of the 6.95 billion people on Earth who aren't part of the Kansas cult.On the other hand,...

By Matthew Hendley

July 23, 2011

[
        {
          "name": "GPT - Billboard - Slot Inline - Content - Labeled - No Desktop",
          "component": "16971022",
          "insertPoint": "2",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
        },{
          "name": "Editor Picks",
          "component": "15769925",
          "insertPoint": "4",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "1"
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "16575154",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "GPT - Rectangle 2x - Slot Auto-select - Labeled",
          "component": "15782206",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "16575154",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "GPT - Leaderboard to Tower - Slot Auto-select - Labeled",
          "component": "15782207",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        }
      ]

The creeps from the Westboro Baptist "Church" didn't show up at the funeral for 24-year-old U.S. Army Spc. Jordan Christopher Schumann in Fort Pierce last night, which is good news for the rest of the 6.95 billion people on Earth who aren't part of the Kansas cult.

On the other hand, that would also make the church's pastor, Fred Phelps, a liar.

Phelps called the Pulp yesterday morning to let us know his minions would be dropping by with their "God Hates Fags" signs about half an hour before the funeral -- which never happened.

As "Pastor" Phelps should know, the Good Book has a thing or two to say about liars.

According to the Pulp's handy Bible, there are six things God "hates," and we'll give you a hint -- "fags" ain't one of 'em:

Proverbs 6:16-19

16 There are six things the LORD hates,
seven that are detestable to him:
17 haughty eyes,
    a lying tongue,
    hands that shed innocent blood,
18 a heart that devises wicked schemes,
    feet that are quick to rush into evil,
19 a false witness who pours out lies
and a person who stirs up conflict in the community.

Wow, that sounds a bit like Fred Phelps.

Follow The Pulp on Facebook and on Twitter: @ThePulpBPB.

KEEP NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. Your membership allows us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls. You can support us by joining as a member for as little as $1.