National Basketball Association

Chris "Birdman" Andersen and Mike Miller Performed "Ice Ice Baby"

The Miami Heat's Shane Battier hosted his second-annual "South Beach Battioke Celebrity Karaoke Contest" on Monday night. The event has turned into a must-see as members of the Heat get up on stage and sing karaoke for charity, with proceeds going to the Battier Take Charge Foundation. And while L ... More >>

Miami Heat Sign Chris "Birdman" Andersen to Ten-Day Contract

The Miami Heat, in desperate need to have someone grab more than four rebounds a game (seriously, the Heat are currently ranked 29th in rebounds, which is just straight-up ass), worked out Chris "Birdman" Andersen two weeks ago, and apparently liked what they saw enough to sign him to a 10-day contr ... More >>

Miami Heat Workout Chris "Birdman" Andersen

In case you haven't noticed, as kickass as the Miami Heat has been this season (23-9 so far), they've been refried ass when it comes to rebounding. The World Champs rank among the worst in the league in rebounding.  To fix this, team President Pat Riley worked out former Denver Nugget and cur ... More >>

Miami Heat Takes Down OKC on Christmas Day, 103-97

Throughout the early part of the NBA season, the men of the Miami Heat played basketball games like they were simply hoarding their fucks for the impending Mayan Apocalypse. Their defense was terrible. Their shooting, erratic. Their desire, seemingly lacking. But, since Christmas is a time of gi ... More >>

Miami Heat Ready for Christmas Showdown With Thunder

It's Christmas Day. Which means family, gifts, egg nog, and Miami Heat basketball. Lately the Heat have had to face off against the Lakers during the X-Mas Day Showdown. But this year, the NBA deemed it necessary to schedule a rematch of the NBA Finals (Remember that? When the Heat dismantled the O ... More >>

Don't Worry, Miami: NBA Fans Everywhere Still Hate the Heat

Despite a couple of good swings, the Miami Herald's Dan Le Batard pretty much failed to connect with reality in his column last Sunday, a 1,000 word humble-brag tricked out as a nostalgia job. The basic thesis here moans that the Heat's 2012-13 season is a lot less "fun" now that the entire sporti ... More >>

Heat Fall to the Lowly Washington Wizards, 105-101

This is what happens when the Heat players look like they left all their fucks in their other jeans and those jeans are in the wash. A 105-101 loss to the Washington Wizards, the worst team in all of professional sports: That's what happens. It's nothing new. The Heaters have been lollygagging the ... More >>

LeBron James Named Sports Illustrated's Sportsman of the Year

In the least shocking news of the entire history of human persons, Sports Illustrated has named LeBron James the 2012 Sportsman of the Year. All LeBron pretty much did this year is cleave the earth with his astounding awesomeness by winning his first NBA title for your Miami Heat, won his third NBA ... More >>

LeBron James Exploded on the Rockets Last Night

We've seen it before. And yet, every time he does it, it's like witnessing a supernova in person for the very first time. It may take some work to grapple with LeBron's awesomeness. Breaking down his game might be counterintuitive. Only because, even though we think we've seen this kind of game be ... More >>

Dwyane Wade Will Donate Tonight's Game Check to Victims of Hurricane Sandy

The last time the Miami Heat were in New York, they were busy denting Knickerbocker ass on their way to a first-round playoff series victory, the first of many on their way to the title. Remember when New York managed to win one game in that series and Madison Square Garden celebrated like the Knic ... More >>

Miami Heat Get Their Rings, Take Down Celtics

The Miami Heat kicked off the 2012-12 season last night by first getting their championship rings, and then by sticking a foot into the Celtics' assholes. 'Twas a glorious night indeed. And while traditionally ring ceremony games have been a snoozer, mainly because the team getting their rings we ... More >>

David Stern Called Hurricane Sandy "Katrina" Last Night Before Heat Game

Lost in the hoopla that was the amazeballs that was the Miami Heat championship ring and banner pregame ceremony was NBA Commissioner David Stern taking a moment to remember the victims of the recent storm that hit the North Atlantic by calling it Hurricane Katrina. "Before we begin, I know that ev ... More >>

The Cocky Heat Fan's Guide to Why the Miami Heat Will Repeat as NBA Champions

The NBA season kicks off tonight when the Miami Heat hosts the Boston Celtics. But before that, the Heat players will be receiving their championship rings and unveiling their 2011-12 NBA Finals Champions big-ass banner that will hang in the rafters at the American Airlines Arena like a giant pair o ... More >>

NBA GM Survey: Heat Will Beat the Lakers in the Finals

NBA.com took their annual general manager survey recently and, according to the consensus, the Miami Heat will repeat as NBA champions, this time beating the L.A. Lakers. The thirty GMs of the NBA were asked 57 questions with topics ranging from who will win the MVP, to best off-season moves, to be ... More >>

Top 10 Miami Heat Haters in the Media

The Miami Heat will begin their NBA title defense next week. It's been a harrowing journey since the Big Three came together in the Summer of 2010. The whole world watched and hated and delighted when they failed to beat the Dallas Mavericks in the NBA Finals. Then they were forced to eat it hard w ... More >>

LeBron James Will Be Targeted by the Lakers, According to Unspecified NBA Execs

According to ESPN.com's Brian Windhorst, some NBA executives believe the L.A. Lakers are going to target the Miami Heat's LeBron James when he becomes a free agent in 2014, because of reasons. The Lakers are very good at building championship contenders, like they did this off-season when they trad ... More >>

Obama Says He's the Miami Heat, Romney Is Jeremy Lin

Remember Linsanity? The New York Knicks point guard who took the world by storm because he came out of nowhere, and because the New York sports media are insane? Lin was hitting game-winning shots, putting up Steve Nash-like numbers and riding a wave of fan euphoria from America to China and all ... More >>

Miami Heat Says It Lost $3 Mil to Rothstein

Miami Heat Say They Lost $3 Million in Scott Rothstein Ponzi

The Miami Heat has reached a settlement to recoup part of what it says was a $3 million loss from its involvement in the $1.4 billion Scott Rothstein Ponzi scheme, according to documents filed Tuesday.The RRA bankruptcy trust initially sued the Heat and its affiliate, Basketball Properties Ltd., to ... More >>

Miami Heat Doughnuts: Celebrate the Champs for a Buck

According to website hoopshype.com, the Miami Heat's payroll is a staggering $80,290,662. Even more unbelievable is the fact that Miami came in number five on this list (behind the Boston Celtics, Orlando Magic, Los Angeles Lakers, and Portland Trailblazers).  You could call it money well spent ... More >>

Miami Heat Parade Slideshow: Confetti, a Trophy, "Please Don't Eat My Face" T-Shirts

If you couldn't make it to today's parade celebrating the Miami Heat's NBA championship, we've got a big pile of photos from the event -- there are players, there are fans, there are T-shirts that reference the "Miami zombie."View photos from the Miami Heat 2012 Championship Parade here.

Heat Versus Thunder for NBA Finals: Let the Oklahoma City Trash Talk Begin

Anyone with a passing interest in sports is about to be inundated with talk of King James versus Prince Durant, Oklahoma City versus Miami, a wholesome young crop of basketball players versus the most hated/worshiped trio in the NBA. Sports rivalries are fun, especially the kind that are gratuitousl ... More >>

Miami Heat vs. Charlotte Bobcats

South Florida Muslims Seek a New Way to Get Along in the Wake of Terrorism Charges and Bigotry

The Good Heated Ladies

Heat, Bulls, and Hormones

The King Takes on the Jester

Zoned Out

Mavericks High Schools Hope to Profit From Education – But at What Cost?

Back Where We Started

Miami Heat Versus Orlando Magic

UPDATED: Joe Biden's Brother Is President and "P.T. Barnum" for SoFla Charter School Chain

UPDATE: The Palm Beach County School Board's vote on three new Mavericks schools has been postponed. Read more after the jump.When owners of a for-profit charter school chain go before the Palm Beach County School Board tomorrow night seeking approval for three new high schools, they'll have a celeb ... More >>

Nielsen Poll: LeBron James No Longer a Marketing Superstar

Not so long ago, LeBron James could sell anything from Vitamin Water to Nike sneakers simply by treading water in a swimming pool.Now, the Miami Heat star's popularity has declined so drastically that he's no longer one of the top 10 most marketable players in the NBA, according to the latest Nielse ... More >>

Udonis Haslem at Juiceblendz Grand Opening Saturday

Miami Heat Udonis Haslem will sign your Smoothie on Saturday.​Juiceblendz in Weston is having a grand opening celebration this Saturday, June 25, with a special appearance by Miami Heat forward Udonis Haslem. Haslem will sign autographs from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. with a Smoothie purchase ... More >>

Top Three LeBron James/Miami Heat Memes to Commemorate the NBA Finals

LeBron James plays to the tune of his tiny violin.​LeBron James brought his talents to Miami this year to complete what should have been the first ultimate triumvirate the NBA has ever seen.James, Dwyane Wade, and Chris Bosh were hailed as superheroes who were going to lead the Miami Heat to champ ... More >>

A Vocabulary Lesson in Honor of LeBron James' Defeat

Together at last, Wade and James crashed.​​Maverick (noun): An independent individual who does not go along with a group or party.Cavalier (noun): A gentleman trained in arms and horsemanship. Hubris (noun): Exaggerated pride or self-confidence, e.g. LeBron James. Not to belabor the point, but l ... More >>

How a LeBron Hater Learned to Stop Loathing the Miami Heat

It's tough to hate Dwyane Wade. ​Let's get one thing clear: I'm still angry with LeBron James. I think he's arrogant, immature, and full of an inflated sense of importance that was, ironically, fed by years of hero worship in his hometown of Cleveland. His decision to use a nationally televised ES ... More >>

Miami Heat White Hot Road Rally Tomorrow Night

​If you've been following the Miami Heat during this NBA post-season, you know the Three Kings and company have been white hot, tearing through playoff teams like Philadelphia and Boston with ease. Now, the Heat are poised to knock off Chicago in game five of the conference finals tomorrow night. ... More >>

After the First Weekend of NBA Playoffs, Miami Heat New Vegas Favorite

There's a new favorite in town.​One game into this year's NBA playoffs and the Miami Heat are the new Las Vegas favorites to win the championship. Going into this weekend, the two-time defending champion Lakers were still the odds-on favorite, generally going at about 5-to-2 odds in most books.But ... More >>

New York Times Blasts Heat Fans for Mojitos and Empty Seats

Too many empty seats greet Heat stars.​What's the problem, Miami Heat fans? Are you too busy sipping mojitos and grazing on patatas bravas to get your butts in the seats on time? Is it the economy? Do you secretly hate LeBron James as much as the rest of the country does?These are the allegations ... More >>

King LeBron James Gets Trounced by Cleveland Cavaliers

It hurts, LeBron, doesn't it?​So this is what karma looks like.Last night, LeBron James arrived at the Quicken Loans arena in Cleveland wearing a T-shirt that said "Long Live the King." That kind of hubris doesn't go over well in the Paris of the Rust Belt. Especially not when you are the fallen h ... More >>

A Nugget of Hope

Were Miami Heat Players Actually Crying After Yesterday's Game?

We know from Tom Hanks' famous quote in A League of Their Own, "There is no crying in baseball!" But is there is crying in basketball?If you believe what Miami Heat coach Erik Spoelstra had to say after yesterday's close loss to the Bulls, yes, Heat players were shedding tears in the locker room af ... More >>

Eat Escargots, Watch LeBron

Dwyane Wade: Phil Jackson Wants to Coach the Heat (Video)

​The Miami Heatles have certainly had an exciting first half of the season: "The Decision" drama, the rough start, the stretch of total domination (winning 21 of 22), the lessons in karma, the onslaught of injuries, and now another losing stint. (Last night's loss to the Knicks makes five losses i ... More >>

A Slow Burn

LeBron James Tweets About Cleveland's Epic Loss: "Karma Is a B****" (UPDATE)

flickr.comEmbracing his new bad guy persona...​As the Miami Heat has hit a stride of domination over the past few weeks, LeBron James has said publicly that he's beginning to enjoy his new "villain" role. (Especially, it seems, when it comes to the King's former kingdom.) And to that end, last nig ... More >>

Keeping Warm All Winter

Luck for the Irish

Top 5 'Justice Is Served' Moments Of The Week, From LeBron to a Former Madoff Investor

via NBC Miami​Justice, or even injustice, is a concept often taken for granted as a function of democracy served in a courtroom. That is, until weeks like this come along, and we are reminded of what happens when people take justice into their own hands, in and out of the courts. Sometimes it's ug ... More >>