On a sunny afternoon, a six-foot-one man named Andre Brown wearing a burgundy hat had just stepped out of his Boca Raton apartment when a bronze-haired stranger approached him wearing a black suit, leather gloves, and an expression stitched with alarm. "Are you who I'm supposed to talk to?" the man ... More >>
Oh, hey. Look at that. The Dolphins lost again. At this point the inevitability of the Dolphins getting their asses pounded week in and week out, year in year out, should be old hat. These are, after all, the Miami Dolphins. And as the San Francisco 49ers punted the Fins' collective dicks to the t ... More >>
The Dolphins are 3-3 and locked into a four-way tie with the rest of the AFC East. Which means either the Dolphins are good again, or the AFC East really, really sucks. Either way. While 3-3 is as mediocre as it gets in the NFL, it's still a vast improvement from the dog shit canon that used to be ... More >>
Last night's episode of Hard Knocks featured gut-wrenching moments, scrappy white receivers, Sean Smith shutting people down, David Garrard getting injured, Chad Johnson getting fired, and rookies getting cock-and-balls-shaped haircuts.It was a jam-packed episode. Here's your recap:
Your Miami Dolphins open their 2012 season tonight when they host the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in a pre-season matchup FUCK YEA. It's a whole new start (again!) for the Dolphins, as they unveil a new coaching regime (again!), a offensive scheme (again!), a new defensive scheme (again!) an ... More >>
Make your annual pilgrimage to Miamis Christmas HQ
It's Halloween. Get thee to a cemetery.