Don't bother lying to us or to yourself. We're not here to stage an intervention or direct you to a 12-step program. We're just as addicted as you are. (Seriously, been stuck on level 44 for like a week. Damn those cherries!)
You pester your friends with life and level up requests, you play it with the sound off during meetings (really hope my editor doesn't read this), and -- just maybe -- you've even shelled out 99 cents for a few lives. (You're weak!)
Now you can take your obsession and turn in into a real-life sugar rush.
Jessica Knopf is owner of Miami-based cupcake truck, Clarabelle's Cupcakes & Other Creations and an admitted Candy Crush addict. (Hello, Jessica.) She has created a cupcake homage to everyone's favorite puzzle game.
"Since we are always creating new flavors (we have over 120 flavors at this point), I decided to do the Candy Crush cupcake because I've become so obsessed with the game!"
Her Candy Crush Saga addiction began just like yours and mine: e-peer pressure.
"I had seen it on Facebook for a while and refused to succumb... however, we were on vacation this summer in Europe and my three kids were playing the game all day long -- talking about it, screaming when they couldn't move to the next level, etc. Then, when we were in the metro in Paris, it seemed like every single person in our car was playing as well. It became a constant topic of discussion between the kids and I (my husband felt a little left out). Then, we actually met a waiter in a restaurant who was on level 275! I felt like I needed to understand what it was all about, so I started and got completely addicted!!"
(275?! Both jealous and mildly horrified.)
The answer to the question burning in your competitive little heart is, Jessica is on level 38 after three weeks of playing.
"It's making me crazy, but I refuse to buy anything -- for now anyway," says Jessica. I try not to play more than a set time each day, but once I get started, it's hard to stop until I run out of lives. Both my manager and my lead baker play as well, so we're always comparing levels."
At Clarabelle's all 120 flavors are 100 percent dairy-free and supervised kosher parve. They even offer Paleo diet friendly varieties.
"Our Candy Crush cupcake is a vanilla confetti cake with vanilla buttercream (no jelly) topped with the representative candies (yellow tear, red jelly bean, chocolate nonpareil etc.) -- or the closest we could get, since all of our candies have to be kosher and dairy-free (as is the bakery). The cupcake is then sprinkled with pop rocks which 'explode' in your mouth."
Yes, "explode"! Like when you manage to pair a sprinkled cookie with a stripey candy! (Maybe we do need a 12-step program.)
If you can't wait to get your real world Candy Crush fix, visit one of their brick-and-mortar locations in Miami. Kendall location: 9800 SW 77th Ave. in Miami. Call 305-270-5600. North Miami Beach/Aventura location: 2566 NE Miami Gardens Drive in North Miami Beach. Call 305-692-9010. Visit clarabellescupcakes.com.