Audio By Carbonatix
A woman’s work is never done, so they say. And if you’re Gov. Rick
Scott’s kind of gal, you might be even busier these next few days
planning your own anti-abortion house party. Indeed, what better way to connect with neighborhood right-to-lifers than a casual shindig, celebrating four new laws that make it even harder for women to access abortion?
And while planning a menu that’s both kid-friendly and pastor-approved is stressful enough, you also have to think hard about
what kind of foods go with a sanctity-of-life theme (jalapeño
cheese poppers) and what dishes don’t (deviled eggs.)
Clean Plate Charlie wants to help you avoid these faux pas so that you can focus on more
important (and fun) things, like hanging Gloria Steinem pinatas and
blending virgin margaritas. So check out three foods not to serve at an anti-abortion party.
Venison
Never has there been a better celebration of new life than the Disney classic Bambi.
Sure, the young, saucer-eyed doe winds up an orphan when a hunter kills
his mom, but any learned conservative will tell you: God gave man
dominion over the fish and fowl, which is how we get delicious deer meat
in the first place. If you do serve venison, however holy it is,
liberals can and will use this part of the plot to complain about
everything involving women and children’s health — from the plight of young,
single mothers to Gov. Scott’s cuts to social services.
Veal Tartare
Funny
thing about iron-deprived baby cows: They’re almost too tender to eat.
Almost. Even better than a nice, hot, saucy plate of osso buco, though,
is a chilled heap of raw veal meat. The only problem neocons might have
with uncooked calf flesh: It’s from a bovine infant, which could be
perceived as somewhat less than right-to-life-y.
Balut
This Filipino specialty consists of a fertilized duck embryo. What else can be said?
