Because Your Skin Should Look Like Pigskin

Stephen Ross’ quest to make the Miami Dolphins the most ridiculous franchise in the NFL is nearly complete. As if getting D-List celebrities that haven’t been relevant since the Clinton Administration to sign on as minority owners and then hiring T-Pain to ruin the original Dolphins fight song wasn’t enough, there’s this: beauty treatments. For men. At the game.

Yes, starting this Sunday, Jack Black (no, not the actor — he’s still relevant) will be providing game-time, complimentary skin and body treatments for male season ticket holders in the club level at LandShark Stadium (2269 Dan Marino Blvd., Miami Gardens). And if you’re one of the men that actually takes part in this, we would like you to please hand over your season tickets along with your balls to the nearest usher. Oh yeah, the Fins will be playing the New Orleans Saints in a game of tackle football. Kickoff is at 4:15 p.m. Tickets start at $41.Call 1-800-FINS-TIX or visit miamidolphins.com.
Sun., Oct. 25, 4:15 p.m., 2009

KEEP NEW TIMES BROWARD-PALM BEACH FREE... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Chris Joseph
Contact: Chris Joseph