Better Than Match.Com…

Ladies, let’s chat about a scenario that’s happened to all of us. It starts like this: You and your boyfriend break up because he lives on some dude’s couch and can’t hold a job – you grew weary of picking up both the check and his dirty laundry. A week goes by. He’s already paired up to another successful, charming woman, and you’re drinking wine from the bottle, weeping your eyes out and forcing yourself to watch an 18-hour television marathon of romantic-comedies with those crazy eye-opening torture devices from A Clockwork Orange. Where is the justice? When do you get rewarded for your accomplishments? Hell, where are all the good men?

Vivica A. Fox’s character, Vivian Wolf, faces similar challenges in the new stage comedy by Je’Caryous Johnson, Whatever She Wants. Instead of alternating between Dibbs and Kleenex, Fox takes charge by forming an exclusive club where only men of the highest caliber are granted membership. Her father, Theodore, played by Richard Roundtree (Shaft? Damn right), isn’t hip to this idea. After all, what kind of criteria determine who is -- and isn’t – suitor-worthy? In Whatever She Wants, if you’re a baby daddy with a pot belly and no job – or if you have even one of those traits – don’t expect to make the cut. But as in real life, there’s a fine line between maintaining self-worth and simply reducing men to a tally sheet. Learn this balance with Vivica, I mean Vivian, tonight at the Kravis Center (701 Okeechobee Blvd., West Palm Beach). Showtime is 8 p.m. Tickets range $36 to $40. Call 561-833-0691, or visit
Mon., Nov. 5, 8 p.m., 2007

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Jamie Laughlin