Enforcer Down

The Miami Heat-hating media (as well as some incurably irrational Heat fans) love to accuse the Heat of being a “soft” team since their not-so-stellar debut to the season. And while the media fail to tell us exactly what it means to be a “soft” team (Are they Charmin soft? Or squishy like an old mango?), they do use buzzwords like finesse to describe the Heat. Well, now the Heat-hating media’s collective pants are really going to explode with the news that forward Udonis Haslem will miss some significant time with an injured foot. Because if there was a guy who could never be labeled a “finesse” player, it’s the indomitable, ball-crushing, blue-collar badass that is U.D. Unfortunately, he tore a ligament in his left foot after falling awkwardly against Memphis two weeks ago. It should be noted that Haslem was going for a rebound when he was injured. It’s also telling that he was hurt playing a team named after grizzly bears. The team says Haslem will be out indefinitely but that he will return sometime this season. For now, the Heat will have to face teams without its enforcer, while the media bloviate about how the Heat is sure to now magically morph into a bag of marshmallows before our eyes. The Heat will play the Atlanta Hawks on Saturday. Watch the game at Mug’s Bar (2671 E. Oakland Park Blvd., Fort Lauderdale). Tip-off is at 7:30 p.m. On Saturdays, women drink free from 6 to 10 p.m., and there’s a two-for-one special from 10 p.m. to close. Visit mugsbar.com and nba.com/heat.
Sat., Dec. 4, 7:30 p.m., 2010