To date, the porn industry presents the most compelling argument for discarding the oft-repeated rule about not mixing business with pleasure. If Hef had followed this rule, we’d never have Playboy (and there’s no existence bleaker than a life without tastefully raunchy spreads featuring top-heavy bunnies.) Support the U.S.’s cash cow — an industry that puts the earnings of Billy Ray Cyrus and Joe Simpson’s bountiful bovines to shame — at the fourth annual EXXXOTICA Miami Beach. From May 8 to 10, the Miami Beach Convention Center will overflow with Penthouse Pets, porno stars, a hottest MILF contest, stripper poles, and Amy Fisher. Wha-what? Yeah, the original Long Island Lolita has ventured into the world of adult films. And no, her first film isn’t titled “Bust It Baby.”

Find the Convention Center at 1901 Convention Center Dr. in Miami Beach. Tickets are $35 for one day and $85 for a three-day pass, but if you splurge on VIP tickets you’ll gain access to the exclusive “Bedroom,” hosted by our swinger friends at Miami Velvet. No one under 18 is admitted, so yet again, kids will have to be content with watching porn on the ‘net, just as they do the other 51 weekends of the year. Visit exxxoticamiami.com for a sexy schedule and illicit info.
May 8-10, 2009