Did you use all your vacation time anticipating, watching, and debating Star Wars Episode III and now find yourself stranded in South Florida? Don't let your light saber go limp, young Jedi! Kilmo and the crew down at Alligator Alley (1321 E. Commercial Blvd., Oakland Park) understand your conundrum. Their antidote is to lure the Big Easy out of the swamp and into Oakland Park.
This Saturday, New Orleans' Johnny Sketch and the Dirty Notes pound their funk/rock style hard enough to make the peel-and-eat shrimp bounce from your basket. Band members Johnny Sketch (lead vocals) and Busta Gnutt (bass, and we can assume the g is silent) describe the band's sound as a blend of "1980s Fishbone with Deep South soul." The people seem to agree. The band's first album, Bandicoot, was smothered with praise, and the fedora-donning six-piece received finger-snapping kudos at Jazz Fest. The group's classically trained style goes down smoother than Abita Amber, but the soulful undertones and hard-driving rhythm section give it that Turbo Dog kick. The Dirty Notes promise to bring the funk, so all you have to do is grab a po'boy, let Kilmo fill your pint, and wait for the floorboards to bounce. Tickets cost $5, and the show starts at 9 p.m. Call 954-771-2220, or visit www.johnnysketch.com. -- Jamie Laughlin
Don't Nobody Miss This!
The world according to Witherspoon
Chances are, you know 63-year-old comedian/actor John Witherspoon as the greatest-of-all Hollywood dads, Mr. Jones, from 1995's Friday, which spawned sequels Next Friday and Friday After Next. Few comparisons can be made to his sermon on the shitter as he relentlessly gags his struggling son (played by Ice Cube) with outdated advice wrapped in insanity and flatulence. Some of us, however, were smitten way back in 1987 when Witherspoon, starring as the proud owner of Winky Dinky Dog in Robert Townsend's Hollywood Shuffle, famously explained the importance of hoecakes: "Hos gotta eat too!" Catch his uncompromisingly unique insanity Thursday through Sunday at the Palm Beach Improv at CityPlace (550 S. Rosemary Ave., Ste. 250, West Palm Beach.) Tickets cost $26.62, and shows start at 8 p.m. Call 561-833-1812, or visit www.palmbeachimprov.com. -- John Shannon
Y-a-a-a-y! It's Jim Florentine
Yankin' South Florida
The character everyone seems able to mimic ad nauseam from Comedy Central's Crank Yankers is Jim Florentine's "Special Ed." Honed from the comic's idle hours spent torturing telemarketers, the riotous dunce, depicted on the show as a puppet wearing protective headgear, seems to appeal to our sadistic nature as he leads normal people down a long, winding dead end of blissful retardation. You can catch the man behind the muppet -- who's also a veteran of numerous Howard Stern appearances -- as he airs his sick mind at the Improv Comedy Club and Dinner Theatre (5700 Seminole Way, Hollywood) Thursday through Sunday. Tickets cost $15.90, and shows start at 8 p.m. Call 954-981-5653, or visit www.improvftl.com. -- John Shannon
Shake a Leg
Seeing a flier for Big Leg Emma, you'd expect the female version of Fats Domino or something. What you get, however, is a six-piece band that fuses bluegrass and folk with reggae, roots rock, and anything else that keeps it upbeat. It's a regular fiddle-flavored hoedown. The leg-shakin' starts at 9 p.m. Thursday at the Bamboo Room (25 S. "J" St., Lake Worth). Tickets cost $8. Call 561-585-2583. -- Jason Budjinski