The Night the Earth Stood Still

Tonight the goyish are all tucked away. They’re fussing with last-minute gift wrapping, baking desserts they should have made days ago, and they’re knockin’ back nog with their toothless grandparents around their energy-inefficient Christmas trees.

For Jewish singles, Christmas Eve and Christmas can feel like a sci-fi movie: You go outside but nobody’s there, stores are boarded up, restaurants are vacant – you have the town all to yourself. You know what that means: Jews gone wild. That’s right. Tonight is one of the biggest party nights of the year for Jewish singles: Jdate accounts will be unmanned, nails will be expertly lacquered, and the Gryphon will be packed with hundreds of sexy singles at the 21st Annual Mazel Tov Ball. Gryphon (5711 Seminole Way, Hollywood) is the perfect location for such an event, since Hard Rock casino is unaffected by pesky holidays like Christmas; it’s a living, breathing denominationless organism hell-bent on being the party Mecca any night of the year. That’s why last year’s Mazel Tov Ball brought in close to 1,000 partiers. Event organizers assure us that, while the ball is geared towards Jewish singles, everyone winds up there. After all, to the gentiles who’ve been trapped inside with their grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, and sticky young cousins for the last weekend, a party is a party is a party. Tickets are cheap at $20 (in advance at www.mazeltovball.com) and $25 at the door.
Mon., Dec. 24, 2007

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Jamie Laughlin