You know you're not in Kansas anymore when Thea Vidale takes the stage. And God help you if you're a "bony bitch" -- you'll be the target of Vidale's merciless ridicule. The plus-sized comedian (whose breasts alone could comfortably house the Olsen twins) is making the world safe for women who actually digest their food.
The 49-year-old former waitress has come a long way from yukkin' it up with her cowboy customers in a Texas restaurant. Soon after her first open mic in 1986, she began to gain notoriety from numerous TV appearances, one of which landed her a People's Choice Award nomination for her 1990s ABC sitcom, Thea, in which she played a widowed mother embroiled in the clichés of child-rearing.
One of "Comedy's Dirtiest Dozen" -- an honor bestowed on the sickest minds of 1989 in the uncensored movie of the same name -- Vidale stops off in South Florida on her national comedy tour, called "Thea Vidale, Down & Dirty." Check her out at the New York Comedy Club (8221 Glades Rd., #10, Boca Raton) on Friday, June 17, at 9 p.m. and Saturday at 8 and 10:15 p.m. Tickets cost $12. Call 561-470-6887, or visit www.nyccboca.com. -- John Shannon
Ian and Amy are Even Stevens
Ian MacKaye (say it with us: Mac-eye) is the one hero whom uppity hardcore kids and dirty punk rockers can agree upon. The politically minded mouthpiece of Minor Threat and Fugazi, he still runs his own label (Dischord), favors all-ages shows, and never charges more than $7 for a performance. (You'll never see MacKaye at a Clear Channel venue). Though he's best-known for the raging, hemorrhoid-inducing vocals in Minor Threat, MacKaye's new project, the Evens, gives him a chance to rest his vocal cords and swap back-and-forth singing with bandmate and drummer Amy Farina (of the Warmers). Minimalist guitar and drums, played at hush volumes, make up the band's sound. The Evens stop by this Saturday for a performance at Sweat Records (2320 NE Second Ave., Miami). Doors open at 7 p.m. Admission costs $5. Call 305-573-5681, or visit www.sweatrecordsmiami.com. -- Terra Sullivan
Local DJ Remembered
Memories on the Ones and Twos
Much like a barrel of crabs, the South Florida music community is a tight-knit group. So when Doug Gilmour, a.k.a. DJ Dug Skullery, died on April 28, the community lost an artist and a friend. Known for spinning out the dance tunes at venues such as the Foundation, Abacos, and Respectable Street Café, Gilmour will be missed. Come out and hoist a few in his memory on Saturday at 9 p.m. at Red Lion Pub (10114 Military Trl., Boynton Beach). The memorial party will feature the band the Livid Kittens along with plenty of oldies with lyrics written by the late Mr. Gilmour. The all-ages show is free. Call 561-737-0434. -- Paul A. Leone
Rap metal is out; country is in -- it's a good time for Corrosion of Conformity to bring back Southern metal. The Black Sabbath-inspired North Carolinians are back from the dead, performing with Crowbar, Suplecs, and (yes!) Alabama Thunderpussy on Wednesday at the Culture Room (3045 N. Federal Hwy., Fort Lauderdale). Doors open at 7:30 p.m. Tickets cost $15 to $18. Call 954-564-1074. -- Jason Budjinski