Once upon a time -- 2003, actually -- "destroyers of bulls" Jordan Lorow and Christopher Macfarlane "realized what they must do. They knew that they would need help; an army." So they recruited Joseph Nay and Daniel Levie to play in their band, Lost, My Love? When they finally encountered their fifth member, Craig DiLeo, "He was pacing through volcanic rubble. As he sat, drinking the lava, the four amazing destroyers asked him to join the elite." That's the legend (or goof), anyway. The band has already recorded, but it's been doing shows for only about a month and a half. Alligator Alley (1321 E. Commercial Blvd., Oakland Park) -- where the band plays tonight -- calls 'em pop-punk; band members say their category of music is "other"; we hear traces of Danzig and Fugazi. They play with Pretty Faces beginning at 9 p.m. It costs $3 for age 21 and up; $6 for you young'uns. Call 954-771-2220.
FRI 23
It's being advertised as the "mother of all fetish parties." Fetish gear is required before 3 a.m. A buff, shirtless dude in a cop's hat and a goatee stares out from the website -- www.copafetish.com -- beckoning you to attend. If you're intrigued, head to the Copa Nightclub (2800 S. Federal Hwy., Fort Lauderdale). If you need to pick up some, uh, party favors beforehand, visit Copa's partner, www.paddlewerks.com. They sell 11 shapes of paddles "in a variety of woods and polycarbonate," a wide selection of straps, and canes. Then again, you could also check eBay to see if the prison guards from Abu Ghraib are selling anything second-hand. Call 954-463-1508.
SAT 24
Just because you've got loads of tattoos wrapped around your muscular biceps doesn't mean the only music you can listen to is hardcore. So if you want to see the Cure before heading over to tonight's Bloodclot show at Oasis Sports Bar (5021 Okeechobee Blvd., West Palm Beach), you're more than forgiven. Hell, you'll be reimbursed. That's right -- you save money by flaunting your gloomy side. Just show up with a ticket stub from the Curiosa Festival and get $2 off the normal $10 admission cost. Then you can let loose the testosterone as the stage falls to hardcore supergroup Bloodclot (composed of Cro-Mags, Shelter, and Biohazard members). Also kicking out the fury are Vietnom, Bolt Action, 24 Hours to Live, and Burning Idols. When you get home, you can put on that Vanilla Ice album hidden under your bed. Show starts at 10 p.m. Call 561-616-3326, or visit www.kabbalah.com.
SUN 25
Say what you will about L.A. Guns (well, aside from "L.A. who?"); the band's done more in the past decade than guitarist Tracii Guns' former bandmate, Axl Rose. (Axl's Chinese Democracy album will be released this year. Really.) That's not to say L.A. Guns hasn't had its share of revolving front men. What number are the Guns on now -- 37? Something like that. Anyway, the Guns' new album, Rip the Covers Off, is -- you guessed it -- a covers album. From David Bowie's "Moonlight Daydream" to Led Zeppelin's "Custard Pie," the Guns put the '80s hair metal spin on a varied collection of rock 'n' roll classics. Unfortunately, this includes the Stooges' legendary "Search and Destroy," which really should have been left alone. Hell, not even Iggy Pop could pull that off again. L.A. Guns plays tonight at the Factory (2674 E. Oakland Park Blvd., Fort Lauderdale). Call 954-564-ROCK.
MON 26
Most open-mic nights are little more than a forum for the unprepared and apprehensive. You've seen it all down at the coffee shop. Kid sits on a stool, guitar in hand, struggling to remember the three songs he's written. Occasionally, he stops and apologizes for forgetting. After a nervous cough, he continues until everyone politely applauds in a collective showing of discomfort. But that's not the case with tonight's Open Mic Night at Dada (52 N. Swinton Ave., Delray Beach). You'd be surprised at the talent you'll find amid the many names scribbled on the signup sheet. The event's hosted by Aaron and Maggie of the Freakin' Hott, who got their start two years ago performing at such venues; now they've got a full band and quite the local following. Want to try it? Show up at 9 p.m. to sign up. Call 561-330-3232.
TUES 27
Florence Henri was quite the Renaissance woman. After studying music in the 1920s, the native New Yorker moved on to painting and photography, studying for a year at the Bauhaus design school in Germany before moving to Paris to begin a career as a portrait and advertising photographer. True to the rampant experimentation taking place in the global art world, Henri was one of the new visionist photographers who took a more abstract approach to the traditionally realist medium. Henri's use of mirrors gave her subjects a skewed perspective, altering dimensions of space with a touch of photographic cubism. Hey, why should Picasso have had all the fun? You can view 40 of Henri's photographs at the Norton Museum of Art (1451 S. Olive Ave., West Palm Beach). The exhibit runs through November 14. Call 561-832-5196.
WED 28
Yes, we know it's only July -- a little early to be purchasing your 2005 wall calendar. Unless you're buying the first-ever Delray Beach Firefighter and Paramedic Calendar, in which case, there's no such thing as too early! Photos of the city's hottest emergency personnel -- including members of the dive team, the ambulance crews, and the child safety program -- will be rolled out today at 6 p.m. during a party at Bru's Room (35 NE Second Ave., Delray Beach), and the models will be available to sign autographs. Proceeds from the sale of the calendars will be donated to various nonprofit health-care organizations. Marketing genius Nancy Stewart, who came up with the idea for the calendar, says it took six years to get the green light for the project. She's totally happy with the results, except for one little disappointment: "We didn't get to spritz [the models] up with oil." Calendars cost $15; admission to the party is free. Call 561-274-4663.
