Trade in Your Simple Life for a Hotter One

Watching the Simple Life makes you irate. You know in your soul that you are a much better match to be Paris Hilton’s BFF than Nicole Richie. And now that the Nickster has traded in her flask and sleeping aids for a stroller and a wedding band, Paris is a lone wolf. She needs someone at her side to notate what is and isn’t “hot.” She needs a friend to help cockblock the paparazzi. Damn it, she needs you.

Flaunt whatcha got and let casting directors know that you deserve to be on the new reality TV show Paris Hilton’s My New BFF during today’s auditions. To qualify for a shot on the show (20 perspective platonic soul mates will be chosen from across the country), you have to meet a minimal amount of specific criteria. Namely, you must be either 1) a “hot bitch” or 2) a “fabulously fierce gay man.” And you need to actually be 21 or older and still look younger than 30. Finally, you’ve gotta sign up: email ParisBFFMiami@gmail.com for a chance at an interview; they will be held for the next four days in various Fort Lauderdale and Miami locations. Check out the show’s website at www.ParisBFF.com.
Thu., April 10, 2008

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Jamie Laughlin