Work is For the Dogs

Regardless of how much you dread it, each year Take Your Child to Work Day happens. Your otherwise peaceful sanctuary (AKA: employee break room) is overrun with headless, naked Barbies and all imaginable varieties of Spiderman collectables. But you do the gracious things — make chitchat about height/age gain, and faking an interest while inquiring about life goals — all while secretly thanking the universe for your singledom. Today get sweet, sweet revenge on your coworkers by flaunting your fur child: It’s Take Your Dog to Work Day.

Remind them all of the salad years when their only responsibility was to their loyal canine companion. To do this we suggest letting him sit in your lap and assist in typing word documents (Good boy!). Or by showing off Fido’s inner corporate, yuppie puppy and having him sniff business cards in place of asses. Or go for broke, the penultimate vindication to a world of procreators: pet/owner matching business suits. Celebrate the good life at your job today, and help remind the world how many cool animals need an adoptive home.
Fri., June 20, 2008

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Jamie Laughlin