What are they putting in this, this trance music that makes its adherents so suspiciously positive? Paul van Dyk, the most famous DJ in the world, was nice enough to give us a hint in a telephone talk from Ibiza, Spain. “Electronic music,” he says in a hyper German accent,…

Teal us about it! thu 8/11 The Marlins are having something of a schizophrenic season. They start out in first place, then drop to last; now they’re in second; then they’re in fourth. On any given day, another player is injured (latest casualty: catcher Paul Lo Duca, pictured). This is…

“Our philosophy is, never try to be funny,” Dave Hyland says. Surprising words from a member of an improv comedy troupe. But Hyland, who at age 34 considers himself one of the genre’s “elder statesmen,” explains the thought process used by his group, Mod 27: “If you force the issue,…

Y’all remember the words to “Zungguzungguguzungguzeng,” don’t you? “Nuff a dem a talk bout me nuh have nuh girlfriend/yuh a idiot bwoy, me have a hundred and ten.” Say you’re born in Kingston, Jamaica — but as an albino, a.k.a. a “dundus.” Top that off with the fact that your…

Artsy interns show what they’re made of THU 8/4 For many high school students, the transition from sheltered teen to frat-ready adult usually involves the switch from home-cooked meals and freshly scented laundry to dining on cold cereal and wearing boxers so stiff they could stand up and walk to…

DJ Denny Tsettos brings the goods SAT 8/6 “I play two types of records,” DJ Denny Tsettos says. “My oh-shit! records and my what-the-fuck? records. When you hear what-the-fuck? records, you’re like, ‘What is that? I’ve never heard it! It’s incredible!’ When you hear an oh-shit! record, you say, ‘Oh…

To get your artwork shown at the Gallery of the Unknown Artists, you don’t need no fancy résumé or college degree. You don’t even need a portfolio. You just need to stop by and let the owners, Ceci Weaver and John Grove (wife and husband), have a look-see. If they…

Filmmakers FLEX their creative muscles WED 8/3 If you think David Lynch’s films are strange, check out Rob Tyler’s Magic Hostess: The Electric Can Opener. The four-minute flick — which extols the virtues of said household appliance — contains enough subtle humor and surprises (Mr. T makes chili?) to leave…

Marlins pressured to perform in the season’s second half FRI 7/29 At the beginning of this baseball season, the Marlins were predicted to take the top spot in the NL East. It was supposed to be as easy as stealing candy from a baby. But at presstime, the Fish were…

And have some java too THU 7/28 Getting your drink on around Fort Lauderdale’s Himmarshee Village doesn’t necessarily mean downing Jack and Cokes all night and dancing to booty music (though that is loads of fun). Sometimes that drink is nothing more than a latte at Brew Urban Café (209…

To host the Pirates… and the ladies TUE 7/26 After losing three straight at home to the Cubs and then being on the road for two consecutive weeks, the Marlins return home to battle the struggling Pittsburgh Pirates Tuesday through Thursday. Before Wednesday’s game, the Marlins will hold a Ladies’…

Local authors inspire you to get your pens a-pumpin’ TUE 7/26 Sometimes, a short conversation or a little quote will inspire you to get off your bum and pursue your dreams. Fort Lauderdale-based novelist Christine Kling, who writes about the adventures of a female tugboat captain, has said, “I’ve spent…

Thor, baby! Where have you been? “In Vancouver, British Columbia,” the mighty icon of rock says via telephone. “It is great to be amongst the trees and the owls. Very much like Norway.” And what have you been doing since you unleashed the anthem “Thunder on the Tundra” in ’84?…

Word to your bank account FRI 7/15 As Flavor Flav and Vanilla Ice can tell you, it’s a shame to sell millions of records, then squander your fortune and end up on The Surreal Life. Better to play your cards like Russell Simmons, who made his money in hip-hop and…

Those of us who go to the dentist more often than we get to the theater should thank Cameron Harris for Brief Encounters: A One-Act Festival. Harris reads scripts like other people devour novels, and she’s chosen six easy-to-digest short plays for the fest. The great thing about watching a…

Off-off-Broadway THU 7/7 After continually being called to audition for roles such as “Gangster Number One,” Edwin Sanchez, then an actor, grew tired of being typecast. Since he didn’t see many juicy roles for people of color, gays, lesbians, and general misfits, he’d write his own darn plays. Moving off…

With a lover’s wish THU 7/7 Those paper-crazy folks at the Morikami Museum and Japanese Gardens (4000 Morikami Park Rd., Delray Beach) must have stock in Georgia-Pacific. If they’re not creating giant origami animals to raise awareness about Florida’s endangered species, then they’re hanging paper cranes from Christmas trees in…

Before there were rock stars, there were artists. They snorted, smoked, and drank a variety of mind-altering substances. They knocked up their girlfriends and threw chairs at them. They blew wads of cash and held hedonistic parties where they’d cross-dress like Geisha girls. They brought hashish cigarettes to friends who…

Milwaukee stumbles down for three-game set MON 7/4 It’s hard not to respect the Milwaukee Brewer organization’s unwavering commitment to inebriation. The team was named after the region’s rich beer-brewing history; the namesake of its stadium (Miller Park) is the Miller Brewing Co.; and its mascot, Bernie the Brewer, used…

Sexy DJ launches soundgrenades on the dance floor SAT 7/2 When you think of freestyling, it’s easy to imagine a rapper unleashing his flow over some bass-heavy beats — not a classically trained vocalist purring over some house tracks. Enter DJ Collette. She grew up in Chicago singing arias, then…

FAU, again FRI 6/24 Who knew the King of Pop could inspire classic theater? “Michael Jackson goes to court and everybody pays attention,” says Richard Gamble, artistic director of Florida Atlantic University’s 2005 Festival Repertory Theatre. In hopes of drawing some attention himself, Gamble chose a whodunit called The Hollow…