Fort Lauderdale Police have arrested five men they believe are connected with at least 20 armed robberies, the department announced in a press conference today. Most of the robberies targeted construction sites and vacant houses. Police say the suspects would enter a construction site, produce weapons, and demand the construction…
[jump] Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response: “Lucky you.” FML Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my…
With the NFL combine this weekend, 21-year-old future millionaires are gathering in Indianapolis, doing everything they can to get the right kind of attention. Darius Butler, a cornerback from Coral Springs who attended UConn, is impressing scouts with his superhuman ability to get high. Jump that is. Not only does…
Deuce McAllister that is. He was released yesterday by the New Orleans Saints. He might be a good fit with Miami, though the Dolphins’ 11-5 record puts them near the bottom of the waiver priority list. Still, this is a day for immature headline writers across this nation to celebrate…
If the love story between Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant were an ’80s romance movie, Dwyane Wade would be the suave, successful rebound guy who dates one of the leads briefly in the second act–right before the big reunion moment.Last night’s NBA All-Star game gave us that moment. Playing on the same team for the first…
Attention boys and girls! It’s that time of the year again. A time for everyone to bask in the mass consumerism of a holiday that seems like it was created just to make a few people feel like shit while everyone else gets laid and eats chocolate (or oysters). If…
No, the Marlins weren’t great in 2008. But they weren’t dreadful either. For most of the season, they were overshadowed by the surprising rise of the Rays across the state. Now you can give the the hometown team some love by writing in your vote for the team’s best player…
Pop quiz sports fans: What do Bengals’ receiver Chad Ocho Cinco (formerly Chad Johnson), Cardinals’ receiver Anquan Boldin, and Giants’ receiver Plaxico Burress have in common? They all have histories of insubordination (and one shot himself in the leg in a nightclub). They all have homes in South Florida. They’re all…
South Florida is the best place in the country to be outdoors. We’ve got beaches, pines, wetlands, and acres of open green fields. Honor your favorite outdoorsy spot in Broward and Palm Beach counties by voting on the best park. Add your winner to the comments field below…
You’ve seen them through the worst time in franchise history and you were rewarded with the best single-season turnaround in NFL history. Now give credit where credit is due, and tell us who the you think the best Dolphins player is. Add your winner to the comments field below…
I think it’s “pretty accurate” to say the Miami Heat can no longer beat the Denver Nuggets. Last night the Heat dropped its 8th straight to Carmelo Anthony and the Nuggets. By 17. At home. And it’s pretty accurate to say it was never close. Was that an American flag…
This is a very special year for skeptics, atheists, secularists, and the the world’s most fervent evolution-promoting intectualists. February 12 marks what would have been Charles Darwin’s 200th birthday…had he better adapted to his environment and not died 127 years ago. This is also the 150th anniversary of the publication…
It was the weekend of positives, including a positive story about a plane crash. The most stimulating revelation came from a Sports Illustrated report that longtime Miami resident Alex Rodriguez tested positive for two different banned steroids during his 2003 MVP season with the Texas Rangers. A-Rod remains silent on the issue.A few…
It seems like the classic love story: middle-aged vampire runs for president, wins heart of teenage girl, stalks girl, girl is forced to make up a desperate story trying to get away from vampire, vampire is charged with a felony. Aww, sweet romance. But this is no work of fiction. John Alfred…
So first Nu’Keese Richardson said he would play for Urban Meyer at the University of Florida. Then on national signing day the speed-demon wide receiver from Pahokee decided he would rather play for University of Tennessee coach Lane Kiffin (a UF rival). Then at a press conference yesterday morning, Kiffin told reporters he…
True, the economy is at its worst point in an entire generation. But that doesn’t mean a few incredibly wealthy individuals don’t still need a place to park their collection of cars that are worth more than my life. At least that’s the idea behind Park Place, a new collection…
As the clock struck zero last night, alas, Dwyane Wade was not a hero. Judging by the expression on his face right after his three-pointer bounced off the rim to end the 93-90 loss to Detroit, D-Wade knew he let a close one get away (or a piece of ice just slipped into…
After a horrible 2007-2008 season, the Miami Heat are loaded with talent this year. And not just talent, young talent. But who’s the best on the team? Is it really Dwyane Wade? Perhaps it’s rookie sensation Michael Beasley? You tell us. Add your winner to the comments field below…
Under any other circumstances, the girl sitting in the oversized red chair might be screaming for help or begging for mercy. A tall, pale young man — his eyes lined in black — inches toward her with a sharp blade in his hand. It’s just after 1 a.m. on a…
Because you are reading this blog, you are probably not stuck in the airport or trying to kill time before you fly back to Cleveland. But if you or someone you know ever find yourself in that precarious situation, Susan Glaser of the Cleveland Plain Dealer has some horrible advice in this…
Calendar editor John Linn was very sick this weekend. I know this not because he told me (he did tell me, but he’s tricky), but because he was unable to fulfill his duties as a judge in this year’s Beer-Offs, held Saturday at the Coral Springs Whole Foods. This second…
I didn’t think anyone could do more to help the homeless people of Broward than New Times — our boxes are frequently used to store blankets and the pages of the “print product” can both warm someone and serve as a feces receptacle, among other applications. But as it turns…
