Oh, art — that indeterminable and elusive thing — that which, like beauty, exists only in the eye of the beholder. One man’s art is another man’s refuse. Art. What is it good for? Art is meant to be communication. And a lot of times, artists get away with being…

Gather ’round, young people, and we’ll tell you a story. Our protagonist is Martin Short. You might remember Short from such seminal roles as Ned Nederlander in ¡Three Amigos! or Franck Eggelhoffer from Father of the Bride. No? Come on! Franck, the wedding planner? “The chipper chicken”? Still no? Well,…

Hot-body contests and VIP bottle specials might not exactly be a one-of-a-kind occurrence in South Florida, but that doesn’t mean you don’t still want to know where to find them. Malcriado! Mayhem: Spring Break 2011 is the latest incarnation in the prestigious tradition of spring-break debauchery to grace Fort Lauderdale…

Female chauvinist piglets, rejoice! Now you can have your very own beefcake to objectify, all for a very good cause, of course. Head over to American Rock Bar around 7 p.m. Saturday and you’ll be able to ogle and objectify the flesh on sale at the “Hunk-a-Burnin’ Love” live firefighter…

It’s not easy being Irish in South Florida — the sun is not our friend. But there’s one day a year when the palest among us can come blinking into the light, when we can wear our freckles proudly. It’s the one day when everyone wants to be Irish. And,…

True born-and-raised Floridians probably remember Circus Playhouse in Hollywood. Long gone now, it was a progenitor of the ubiquitous Chuck E. Cheese but so much better. Lionel the Lion played ringmaster to a cast of animatronic animal friends. Nothing like watching an enormous gray hippo in her tiny pink tutu…

Existence is a blank canvas upon which the mural of your life is painted. Some people take this sentiment more literally than others. Some people become actual painters. Others cover themselves in tattoos. But if you are a true literalist — and prefer your body art be the removable kind…

South Florida has long been the mecca for snowbirding seniors and so there has never been any shortage of activities for grandma and grandpa. And no one can deny how the once Spring Break capital of the world has also catered to the very young, hard-partying crowd. But those in…

It’s Girl Scout Cookie time. They’re everywhere: on street corners, at tables outside grocery stores, and lurking just outside the doors of your gym. With their cute faces and deliciously evil snacks, who can resist them?! It’s for a good cause, right? Yes. But good cause calories will make your…

Ghost. The Ghost and Mrs. Muir. Casper. Poltergeist romances can make it seem that the only way to find a man with a good heart, is to find one with no pulse. But Ghost-Writer, the play by Michael Hollinger, is more than just another inter-dimensional love story or a good…

Since prehistoric humans first started pondering things, we all have been fascinated by the moon. What’s it doing up there? Is it made of cheese? It makes werewolves, brings out the lunatics, and controls the tides! OK, yeah, it definitely controls the tides, but the rest was merely myth, well,…

The likelihood that you read New Times and consider yourself a huge fan of Enrique Iglesias is slim to none. We’ve done the research. We conducted focus groups and sat through interminable meetings with pie charts and bar graphs and pivot tables. Then we polled the staff. One person who…

The female form with its hourglass silhouette has long been considered the peak of visual perfection — the curvier the form, the better — up until Kate Moss and her acolytes. Nowadays, the bountiful Botticelli ideal is known as the pinup girl or cheesecake. If you’d like to partake in…

If you’ve been a South Florida lifer and enjoy local music, you’ll probably remember a little place called Alligator Alley. For the newbies, we are not referring to the desolated stretch of highway running through the center of the Everglades. This Alley was a tiny bar tucked in a strip…

Does the idea of sweaty women making full contact with one another turn you on? If so, then here’s a tip: Keep it to yourself. Because if the Gold Coast Derby Grrls find out you’re sexually objectifying them, they might put you in a hurt locker. Carnivorous Licks and Nauti-Seacups…

During the filming of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, they had to keep telling the actors not to make the light saber sounds during the fight scenes. Apparently, Star Wars is so deeply ingrained in our collective psyche that the actors didn’t even realize they were doing it…

You probably know that Superbowl XLV is on February 6 this year. You might even know about Puppy Bowl VII. But we’re willing to bet you haven’t heard about the Dog Bowl. Now in its Vth (that’s ancient Roman for fifth) year, the Dog Bowl is a day of fun…

In South Florida, most events for young professionals involve smoky clubs, pulsing music, and DJs from the Jersey Shore. Last year, a new organization came into being called Ghost Light Society. Its aim is to bring together young professionals, between 21 and 45, who have an interest in supporting the…