Pop Quiz, Kids: D’ya Want a Car for $7?

That’s right: $7 (seven dollars). And yet seven in every ten students at the University of South Florida said, “Meh.” That, apparently, is too much to pay for the use of a car for one hour, a price that includes gas and insurance and inflated tires and OK WHAT THE…

Lighthouse Point Man Survives, Thrives in Thrillsport at Age 55

That’s the view from within the cockpit of Steve David’s hydroplane. And that flying yellow thing at the three-second mark is a near-death experience: another hydroplane that flipped right over him. That happened at a race on Washington state’s Columbia River in 2006, which is the fastest hydroplane track –…

Obamas: We’d Rather Be in Cleveland

Anyone else a little miffed that Barack and Michelle have chosen to go campaigning for health-care reform in Cleveland instead of South Florida? Is our health care not bad enough for you?Even the Plain Dealer acknowledges that the president is  “us[ing] Cleveland as a backdrop to flog Congress into action.”…

Baltimore Eulogizes Lauderdale “Dump”

Let’s be good sports and thank the Orioles for their 13 years of playing Grapefruit League baseball in Fort Lauderdale Stadium — a “dump,” as the team’s Baltimore-based beat writer so eloquently put it. Hey, if the guy lives in Baltimore, who are we to question his definition of dump?But…

Oh, Cheer Up. You’re Not in Timbuktu.

Today’s South Florida forecast calls for a high of 94, which puts us just two fragile degrees below Fort Lauderdale’s record high for this day. But the residents of this region have an annoying habit of taking their usually bearable weather for granted. And so it’s in that spirit that…

To Make a Buck in South Florida Real Estate, Get a Tenant

At least a few real estate investors in South Florida have managed to crawl out of the crater that formed from the housing bubble’s burst. They’ve managed to wring profit from an otherwise lost art: renting.An article in next month’s Forbes magazine names Hollywood and West Palm Beach as two…

Ex-Husband Maligns Crist Donors

Charlie Crist and wife Carole Rome are recently returned from a star-studded fundraising trip to the Hamptons. Rome’s ex, Todd Rome, was not invited, probably because he was a threat to give a toast like the one he gave to the New York Post:”THEY figure they might as well come…

Finally, a Michael Jackson Tribute With Artistic Merit

Some of my colleagues are not impressed by Michael Jackson tributes, but I still am. Provided the tributes come with Jackson-esque dance moves, are shot with time-lapse video and produce a smashing piece of art. So David German of West Palm Beach, yours is a tribute worthy of the King…

Wax Off: Karate Kids Stay Ninja-Silent During Lauderdale Tournament

Who knew that this weekend in Fort Lauderdale, the National Karate Federation staged its national championships? Clearly, this is a federation that needs some steel cages, a Kimbo Slice, and a sequel to the 1984 Ralph Macchio classic. Well… one outta three ain’t bad.Here’s video shot from this weekend’s tournament…

10-Year-Old Boca Girl Tells of Harrowing Boat Ride With Sex Offender

File this one under “Parent’s Worst Nightmare.” Broward Sheriff’s Office is reporting the arrest of a registered sex offender from Plantation who was working at a water park in Deerfield Beach. Corey Hipscher allegedly told the parents that, due to a boat’s “weight limit,” he couldn’t bring any other adults…

Uh-Oh! Nut-Stomping Deerfield Blogger Laces Up a Steel-Toed Boot…

Marty Popelsky is the latest Deerfield Beach commissioner to wander into the crosshairs of the city’s ethics-obsessed blogger, Chaz Stevens. The man behind Acts of Sedition tells Juice that later today, he’ll publish a post that details a flagrant abuse of power by Popelsky. He’ll then blast that post across…

Ex-Governor Has Spooky Story About Challenger Explosion

With the news full of moon landings, former Florida Gov. Bob Martinez recalls a far-less-triumphant moment in the American space program. In this month’s Florida Trend, Martinez describes how he was on the campaign trail, hustling for votes in South Florida on the day in 1986 when the Space Shuttle…

To Fellow Inmates, Madoff’s So Bad, He’s Good

Schadenfreude-starved followers of the Palm Beach pirate may be delighted to hear this, from an inmate at Madoff’s prison in Butner, North Carolina, courtesy the New York Post:”Some of the guys were talking about smacking him around a little, just to get the notoriety of it.”But don’t get your hopes…

Like Pulling a Yacht Through the Eye of a Needle

One can imagine how a financial crook can form a sentimental attachment to his most extravagant purchase: an item that managed to be both outrageously expensive and hopelessly impractical, which for those reasons became a metaphor for his self-destructive excess: the yacht.Mark Pomerantz is the attorney who — with the…

The Finger That Robbed 7-Eleven

Broward Sheriff’s Office detectives are searching South Florida for the human being who belongs to the finger who robbed a 7-Eleven in Pompano Beach. The BSO release does not say exactly what, if anything, was on the tip of that finger that made it so menacing as to cause cashiers…

Departing Hoops Coach Bringing South Florida Talent to New Job

We reported a few weeks ago that Deon Thomas, the University of Illinois basketball program’s all-time leading scorer who settled briefly in Pembroke Pines, was taking a job as the coach of a community college near St. Louis. And now Thomas tells Juice that he’s taking some of the region’s…

Local Vampire to Be Released at Dawn

Oh, but the sun is no match for this Prince of Darkness. Jeffrey Epstein, the world’s wealthiest registered sex offender, no longer has to spend nights in a stockade, where since October he’s been in a work release program, reports Jose Lambiet at Page 2 Live.Rather, he returns to his…

An Elegant Flip, Then a Bellyflop

It’s one of those obvious but still necessary tasks: Now that the Florida housing market has been revealed as one giant scam, someone had to document exactly how it happened. So that after we all get buried by debt, Pompeii-style, some future archeologists can piece together our culture, then display…