If surfing ate a pot brownie, became a vegetarian, and started doing yoga, you'd have paddleboarding. In recent years, you may have noticed an increased number of people standing up in the middle of the Intracoastal, seemingly gliding their way across the water like a trendy Jesus. You may have also noticed a shared facial feature on all these aquatic saviors — a big ol' smile. That's because the paddleboard is like a big buoyant pill, a cure for the stresses of land life. If you live in South Florida and you've still never been, shame. But don't worry. You can change that fact at Sunrise Paddleboards. From private group lessons to tours of Fort Lauderdale and even fitness classes, Sunrise Paddleboards is ready to prescribe your needed dose of chill. Sunrise Paddleboards knows everything there is to know about surfing's laidback cousin, offering rides on the beach, in the Intracoastal, during the day and at night. This is the closest you'll ever get to being a manatee. Unless you keep eating all that pizza.

What happens under the sea? Well, besides singing crabs and mermaid love stories? Do you know? You don't have gills, so probably not. Oceans cover a vast majority of our planet, yet — to us — they remain mysterious. What if we're missing out on dolphin concerts or crab wars? What if there is some type of undiscovered bottom-dwelling oceanic species of worm that poops gold and chocolate? Don't we owe it to ourselves to find out? Yes. Yes, we do. And the first stop on your journey of aquatic exploration should be Fort Lauderdale's Underseas Sports. Not only does it have all the gear you need to find this new gold-poopin' worm but the folks there will teach you how to use it too (the gear, not the worm). Underseas Sports offers an array of classes and certifications, from the most inexperienced of beginners to professional-level master classes. And once you know how to not die in the water, they'll even take you on a dive trip to cool local reefs or even the Florida Keys. Since 1971, Underseas Sports has helped make our planet a little less mysterious. And, one day, they're going to find that goddamned worm.

Any tackle shop with a taxidermy hammerhead shark sprawled atop its roof is worth its weight in one-ounce sinkers and fluorocarbon leader. Such is the case with Carl's. Packed inside the 1,334-square-foot store is everything from lead-head jigs for your snapper rigs to electric reels for the next great white shark they catch off the coast. You can dream about hooking up with one of their Star rods while they service and respool your Penn. Fifteen minutes in Carl's and you'll have your live shrimp, bonito hunks, and a net for when you score that ten-pound red grouper you've been waiting for. And here's a bonus: You can snag your ice and brews from a convenience store next door. Fish on.

It's hard to keep a smile on your face when your job entails working in beating sun or pouring rain, covered in fish blood, squid slime, and salt for hours at a time. But the mates aboard Catch My Drift do just that while keeping lines tight and bait buckets full on each of their 8:30 a.m., 1:30 p.m., and 7:30 p.m. drift fishing trips. A $40 ticket includes rod and reel, tackle, bait, and a fishing license for the trip (but not the tip... hint, hint). On extended Saturday-night trips ($50), you can spend six hours onboard snagging as many yellowtail and red snappers as the chum slick can lure (within the law, of course). For the squeamish, they'll gladly rig your bait while regaling stories of the fish that got away. And for those who would rather eat fish than catch them, you can enjoy the South Florida skyline on the 85-foot boat's upper sun deck. Just remember to lean over the rail when you chum. No, not the upper rail.

On a sunburnt stretch of asphalt at Dixie Highway and Commercial Boulevard lies Bicycle Spot. This is a store for any bicyclist, not just the kitted-out, Lemond-crazed velodrones. Owner Peyton Walters stocks tons of used bikes along the storefront for beginners and recreational riders and keeps the snazzy stuff inside. Have a stubborn bottom bracket stuck in your project frame that not even your mechanic friends can crack? Peyton, the Thor of South Florida's bicycle scene, will have it loose with two blows of his hammer. And chances are he won't charge you for it, since in the meantime, you'll probably have picked out some new LED lights, a floor pump, and a helmet (why didn't you already have one?). That's what keeps customers coming back every year: great service and selection from down-to-Earth folks who know what they're doing.

Davie car dealer

Honest island in a sea

Of bastard shysters

Let's be honest, choosing a car wash is the definition of a First World problem, but that doesn't mean you should go just anywhere when that problem arises. IShine Car Wash in Boca Raton isn't just some car wash — it's a club. While some places charge an arm and a leg for a single wash, IShine actually gives you the option of paying monthly, giving you unlimited washes all month for a flat rate ($22.95/Supreme, $32.95/Ultimate) when joining the "IShine Club." The family-owned wash also offers unbeatable $3 car-wash specials every "Wacky Wednesday" as well as $3 washes during its Happy Hour and Early Bird designated times throughout the day. The spacious and well-manicured building has plenty of places to chill out while your car is treated to some state-of-the-art spa treatment, and their service is friendly and as fast as you can drink a free cup of coffee.

Two main things come to mind when it's time to find the right mechanic: cost and honesty, two things Jackson Performance makes sure are not a worry when you drop off your car. Jackson Performance does everything from transforming your car into a Fast & Furious-worthy well-oiled machine to handling your quick, basic fixes that always seem to pop up at the worst imaginable time. Its prices are competitive and reasonable, and its service is second-to-none, making you sure your car is in the best hands possible. When you arrive at Jackson Performance, what it specializes in is obvious: elite fabrications. Unlike other places that may have five guys changing tires and oil when you roll up needing an engine rebuild, Jackson Performance specializes in the big jobs, so you can be sure the folks there know what they are doing when you're in need of a major repair. Located in the heart of Pompano Beach, Jackson Performance is the place to go when you need a mechanic.

A cigar isn't just something you smoke when you're on vacation. It's not just something stoners cut open and stuff their weed into. The cigar is a way of life. The cigar is a culture. Somewhere along the way, we forgot that. We started selling factory-made cigars in gas stations. We started chomping on them like gum. We lit them and puffed away because we thought it made us look cool. We killed the cigar. Or did we? If you look closely, you'll see a crack in the cigar's coffin. And through it floats a thin pipe of gray smoke wafting toward the sky. If you follow that smoke long enough, you'll find yourself standing on the patio of Cuenca Cigars in Hollywood. Take a seat. Enjoy the sun, and let one of Cuenca's friendly staff help you find the perfect — not just most expensive — cigar for your palate. Order an espresso, light up, and take it in. Meditate with your cigar; let it teach you about patience and luxury. The cigar still exists. And it's a beautiful thing.

Kreepy Tiki Tattoos
Michele Eve Sandberg

Polynesia-island décor, rockabilly, and the undead are not exactly three aesthetics that blend smooth as coffee, cream, and sugar. But for the past six years, Kreepy Tiki has pulled it off, becoming Fort Lauderdale's most interesting place to get something memorable burned into your arm. Really, the shop's whole raison d'être is about gluing together businesses that you wouldn't expect to complement one another. Boutique clothing with a tattoo parlor? Sure, why not. Throwback island vibe coupled with retro Rat Pack attitude? Give it a shot. Owner (and former tiki carver) Jackson Valiente and his crew of artists have never been afraid to shake things up. As a result, they're the most creatively reliable in the business.

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