Navigation

South Florida Craigslist Remains a Hotbed of Horniness Despite COVID-19

Some South Floridians are bored at home and looking for someone to talk to. Others are looking to shag like they're Austin Powers.
A pandemic is no match for some South Floridians' libidos.
A pandemic is no match for some South Floridians' libidos. Photo by Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels
Share this:
Scientists and medical professionals say we're supposed to wear masks in public places, keep at least six feet apart from other people, and stay away from large groups to protect ourselves against COVID-19.

Scientists also say that isolation makes people crave human contact. While quarantine is making some people's libidos tank, for others, the threat of infection and transmission of a deadly virus is no match for their sex drives.

It's no wonder South Florida Craigslist's Missed Connections board has been especially busy lately, and not just with posts from people hoping to reconnect with whatever hot person they crossed paths with at the grocery store or gas station.

Some South Floridians are bored at home and looking for someone to talk to or maybe even meet in person when this is all over. Meanwhile, others — even in the middle of a pandemic — are thirsty as hell and looking for nookie, social distancing be damned.

Here's a collection of some of Craigslist's best Missed Connections: Quarantine Edition.

New Times knows all about Publix being the place you're most likely to meet your true love. For this person at a Hollywood store, romance clearly isn't dead where shopping is a pleasure:
You were in line at customer service, I was behind you waiting. Our eyes met a couple of times behind your mask, you had beautiful eyes and long hair. I wanted to talk to you but never got the chance before you left. Sure would like to see you again and get to know you better. I am sure you know who you are as I winked at you and just kept looking at your perfect body and beautiful eyes. Let's meet somewhere and talk safely.

The Fort Lauderdale guy who wants to hook up because the virus is almost over anyway:
Older white professional gentleman divorced looking for young attractive white/hispanic female in the Fort Lauderdale area for a hook-up...non -smoker, social drinker..no drama....no more than a 5-6 mile radius from downtown Lauderdale....college girls always welcome....meet at neutral location..if interested, send photo and some stats/should have your own transportation...virus problem is being contained, people are moving about now

The guy from up north who's stuck on South Beach until this whole pandemic thing blows over:
On vacation from up north, have place on Collins ave. Mixed B/W, early 30's, average build, 6'0, handsome.

Looking to have fun, relax, just chill.

Serious women only, prefer fluent in English, and CLEAN

Let's have fun while this COVID-19 nonsense passes

The "normal hot local girl next door" who just wants to talk, no credit card information required:
Hey you, I know this isolation bull has been rough on all of us... I know you want someone who listens, who understands, someone attactive and spicy... Let's text about each other’s fantasies, fetishes, experiences and other naughty things. :) Maybe even exchange pics... I'm a normal hot local girl next door. I love talking dirty... ;) No links, website sign ups or asking for your credit card info...

The senior from West Palm who misses his lap dances:

Dam virus all the strip clubs are closed, missing my dancers!

The Kendall resident looking for the slightly older, possibly married woman in the Devon Aire area:
I've seen you more, and more, lately. Obviously because of this whole quarantine situation. We've chatted briefly a few times. You always smile at me and I always smile back. I think that you are very sexy for your age. I might be slightly younger, but you are incredibly attractive.

I think.
You are married.
The ring tells me so.

So am I.
Happily?

The Lake Worth guy seeking a haircut with benefits:
Because of the quarantine, unable to get a hair cut. 63 yr white bi married male, 6ft3in 215 lbs looking for someone who will host for haircut in exchange for the service of their choice.

The Delray Beach guy looking for a quarantine partner:

Looking for a open minded female companion to spend some time with watching TV, talking, giving a massage, or simply playing some games. I am a 50 year old white male that needs some attention. Please reply with a picture and I'll be happy to tell you more!

A bored Broward resident who just wants to hang out:
Hello to all the LADIES out there ... I am bored as hell and really just wanna shoot the shit have some drinks hang out ... Coronavirus has me going nuts indoors need to get out... hit me up if your down for some drinks or whatever I’m sure we can find a spot to just chill and have a good time

The Miami resident who advises not taking too many people to pound-town all at once:
It may seem real simple to zip on over to Bdirti . com and pound as many women as possible on there in south Florida, but it would be in everyone's best interest to just use those types of sites to find one person to do "it" with and stick with her for the time being. Makes sense.
KEEP NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. Your membership allows us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls. You can support us by joining as a member for as little as $1.