Morning Juice: New Megachurch Pastor Scarred into Infomercials | New Times Broward-Palm Beach

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Morning Juice: New Megachurch Pastor Scarred into Infomercials

William Graham Tullian Tchividjian is the new pastor of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church. And before you say, "Why do I care because all I pray to is the religion of Obama-style hope," consider the fact that this church is essentially the size of the state of Alabama. Ok, that's not true, but it seems cliche to say the size of Rhode Island, and besides, Coral Ridge Presbyterian is like twice the size of Rhode Island.

Anyway, William Graham Tullian Tchividjian is the son of preacher Billy Graham, and in this blog post, William Graham Tullian Tchividjian explains that his name is "scarring." He doesn't explain how it scarred him, but it does seem to have forced him into a life of making infomercials about Bibles, as you can see below. Don't feel like you need to watch that whole video to get an idea of who William Graham Tullian Tchividjian is, because watching that whole thing could suck the soul out of the entire state of Rhode Island.

After the jump, check out the Barack Obama Commemorative Edition of The Morning Juice Jump, brought to you by that guy on the corner who tries to sell me the paper.

Bush Note Proves He Can Write

Every news organization worth its weight in pixels has a commemorative Barack edition this morning. As you can see, I'm not so good with the graphics creation, fancy photo spreads, or words and such, so I'll stick to making fun of the note President Bush left for his successor. I'm guessing here, but Bush probably came up with a nickname for President Obama and wrote something simple, like: "Dear President Big Ears, You're welcome."