Rick Scott's Unemployment Compensation Laws Aren't Working

Of course Florida is the hardest place to get unemployment benefits. Because that's how we roll!

The U.S. Labor Department is investigating complaints from unemployed Floridians that Rick Scott and the Florida Legislature's labyrinthine gauntlet to receive unemployment compensation is one giant complicated maw of frustration.

Applicants must fill out a 45-question "skills review" and an online-only application, not to mention fill out forms through snail mail and then wait on hold for hours and hours before hearing an automated service that makes them press a bunch of buttons so it can tell them to keep holding, all in order to receive aid. 

And it's restricting thousands of applicants getting help.

Only one in three applicants actually end up getting any kind of help, which ranks Floriderp dead last in the U.S.

*awkward white rich guy fist pump*

The Miami Herald has this revealing piece on a 65-year-old Ft. Lauderdale man who recounts his frustrations in trying to get aid as he struggles to find work.

"They told me that I was eligible and that I was going to be getting $275 a week," said [Raymond] Togyer. "That was seven weeks ago. To this day I have not received anything. I'm draining my savings to pay my bills."

Scott has claimed that his "skills review" questionnaire is just commonsense. He calls it a reform intended to create a more skilled workforce. Whatever he calls it, only 16 percent of unemployed Floridians are getting help via Governor McCreepyPants' "commonsense" laws.

In the last three years, he cut the business taxes that fund the program by $800 million, and the program is in debt. But, hey, moar skilled workforce talking points!

To combat all this, Scott came out on Wednesday to say how Florida's unemployment numbers are down (RoboRomney TILT!!!!).

But raw data says not so fast:

Florida has added 69,000 net jobs over the last year, a growth rate of 1 percent that lags behind the national growth rate.

But Rick brought out a colored chart with bars and stuff!

In 2011, Scott and the Legislature stuck their meaty claws into the system and came up with his plan that has a long, convoluted list of demands, and an on-line only application system.

But, hey, if you lost your job and Comcast cut off your Internet because you can't pay the bill, better get to your local Apple Store tooth-sweet and use one of their on-display iPads to get online and fill out them 45-questions!

Boom. Problem solved. 

Unemployed people are so lazy, amerite, Rick?