Humor

Inside Florida Puppeteer Robert Brown's Alleged Plans to Eat Children

Our Miami compatriots told you yesterday about Robert Brown, the Tampa children's entertainer arrested this week on charges he was planning on kidnapping a child to rape, murder, and eat him -- quite literally the stuff of nightmares.

He claims it was all just fantasy -- which, though it's unseemly, would not necessarily be against the law. But he was allegedly talking about a child he goes to church with, so the police scooped him up.

Now, we, the iron stomachs of the Pulp, have waded into the disgusting muck that is Brown's criminal complaint to bring you his fantasies as no other news outlet will -- that is, with all the gross stuff intact, because you are a grownup and can decide for yourself what horrifying public documents you expose yourself to.