Former Miami Dolphins wide receiver Brandon Marshall was asked about the latest rash of NFL player suspensions tied to amphetamines, including the ADHD drug Adderall.
Marshall, who is now playing with the Chicago Bears, answered that he doesn't know much about Adderall but that he's heard of players taking boner pills to gain an edge on the field.
"It's such competitive league, and guys try anything just to get that edge," Marshall said. "I've heard of guys using Viagra, seriously, because the blood it's supposed to thin. I don't know. Some crazy stuff. It's kind of scary with some of these chemicals that are in some of these things, so you have to be careful."
According to howstuffworks, Viagra has the brain send signals to NANC cells in the arteries. The NANC cells release nitric oxide. Nitric oxide then acts as a signaling molecule and stimulates an enzyme called guanylate cyclase in nearby cells. The guanylate cyclase converts a chemical called GTP into another chemical called cGMP. The cGMP then causes muscles in the walls of the arteries to relax.
In layman's terms, you get an engorged hard-on that won't quit.
Also, you can supposedly play football really, really good.
Marshall, who was on the Dolphins before he was traded to Chicago, says he doesn't take any drugs to help his performance, saying that it's easy for players to get caught by the league.
"Anytime you take anything over the counter, if you don't approve it with your training room, you can get popped," he said.
According to NFL spokesman Greg Aiello, Viagra is not a banned substance. But that's all the league will say on the matter of the little blue pill.
For his part, Bears offensive coordinator Mike Tice doesn't believe Marshall's claim that some players take Viagra to perform better on the field.
"I've never heard of such a thing," he said. "He's got to be making that up. You've got to be kidding me."
Adderall is the latest trendy banned substance that NFL players are taking nowadays. It's a prescription drug that can "sharpen focus and hone impulse control." So far, seven players have been suspended due to Adderall use.
As you might probably tell from their 5-6 record, none of those players are on the Dolphins.
But since Viagra is not a banned substance, they might want to consider it.
Sure it would be awkward watching football players running around with raging boners, but this team hasn't made the playoffs in four years. SOMETHING HAS TO BE DONE.