Hey, old-timer, what are you doing at a skatepark? You must be, what, 24... 25? This here's a place for young people. Shouldn't you be out at some nightclub tossin' back the brewskis and chasing women? Well, it just so happens that you can do all of that -- drink, skate, and (possibly) score -- the third Wednesday night of the month. For free. Just pop in to Automatic Slim's after 9 p.m. for its weekly Bump & Grind Skate Night and show 'em your AARP card, er, photo I.D. that proves you're over 21. Once inside, you'll know where to go -- there's a five-foot halfpipe adjacent to the front window. Oh, it's safe; there's a net to keep your board from flying onto the bar. Of course, there's nothing to keep you from falling off your board. If anything, the two-dollar Pabst Blue Ribbons are just another obstacle. Keeping the booze to a minimum might be wise, if not for the sake of your swollen hipbone then for the scantily clad bartenders you're trying to impress. Who knows? If you do well, maybe there'll be more bumping and grinding without your board.