Zombie Zoo

Churchill’s will feed the fires of hell Friday when they invite Murderous Rampage, the Fort Lauderdale metal group with a penchant for bloody brutality, to play along with metal group Howitzer and South Florida punkers No Class Action. Murderous Rampage writes songs about food, drinks, and bodily functions like in…

Downtown Music

September’s edition of Florida? Yeah!, the monthly event brought to us by Garo Gallo and Yvonne Colon, will feature indie rockers Matilda Lights, Gallo’s band Dooms de Pop – if you haven’t heard them in a while, they have a new bassist and a new sound – Boise Bob and…

Angry Pudding with a Cherry on Top

Alligator Alley has a stacked lineup for Saturday, which includes the most rawkin’, grrrliest band in South Florida, Angry Pudding. The foursome is one of the best punk groups around, playing with a femme-driven grit that, well, is sort of hard to find in these parts. I admit, I have…

Art in Dutch

Scenic nature shots, in general, are beautiful because nature is beautiful: mountains, rivers, beach scenes, a rock, a lone lily pad floating on a still pond — all beautiful. But it’s just nature. Run it through the eye of Dutch artist Rolf Weijburg and you get prints from an inspired…

Luke Goes Boom on the Ones and Twos

Dutch DJ/producer Laidback Luke cut his teeth on the European house scene in the mid-’90s, and since then he’s been one of the world’s top DJs and currently holds the number 46 position in DJ Mag’s Top 100 DJs list. Hearing him spin, it’s easy to see why he’s achieved…

Play It Loud

Nowadays, strumming a six-string is frequently substituted with rapid button pressing, chords are a combination of colored shapes, and rock stars are digitally animated characters in your latest birthday present. Even on Guitar Hero’s expert level, it’s hard to comprehend the level of passion that would cause Jack White’s fingertips…

If I Was Royalty in a Past Life, Why Do I Live in This Dump?

Since no existing church was privy to Sylvia Browne’s personal Godly revelations, she did what any good celebrity psychic would do: she took the bull by its spiritual horns and founded her own. Within the confines of The Society of Novus Spiritus ™, only she and the Lord are in…

Miss Pretty Had It Coming

When Alicia Olink instructs people to look at her privates, they do it. The Kill Miss Pretty frontwoman exudes that magical prowess necessary for successful rock stars, cult leaders, and mythological sirens alike. So when she addresses her hypnotized crowd with “Hey, look at my vag!” and tugs her anime-styled…

Stick Your Nose in It

Until the Miami Malt Liquor Expo and 8-Bit Nintendo Tournament gets up and running, one of our favorite local booze fests (after New Times’ Beer Fest, of course) is still the Miami International Wine Fair, now in its eighth year at the Miami Beach Convention Center (1901 Convention Center Dr.,…

Code Pink

Whether you fully embrace the color pink or begrudgingly accept it as the gender specific pigment of femininity, the color signifies a host of firsts into the entrance to girlhood. It’s the shade of your first 99 cent tube of Wet N’ Wild lipstick, the hue of the bottle top…

From Stand-up to Hip-Hop

Conundrum Stages, a community theater in Oakland Park, is putting on a jamboree of performances in different mediums today, ranging from stand-up comedy to violin solos. And all the participants are local artists. Artist Afua Hall will dance solo and then the stage will be taken over by hip-hop crew…

For the Babies of the Baby Boomers

Finally a music festival aimed at generations X and Y. The good folks at New Times’ favorite music venue, The Talent Farm (20911 Johnson Street, Pembroke Pines), are eschewing the Greatest Generation and The Baby Boomers in favor of the loud, screeching rock and roll the kids listen to these…

The Heart of the Matter

Eight open-heart surgeries would leave most of us in a helpless heap on the floor crying for our mommies, but not 28-year-old Barry Brandon. This South Florida-born and -bred guy became a professional singer, songwriter, dancer, and comedian after suffering since birth with Shoenes Syndrome, a life-threatening disease that put…

Nun Too Sure

So a priest walks into a classroom — you can probably figure out how the rest goes. As a joke, the priest-as-molester punch line is obvious. In real life, though, you’d better be damn certain of your suspicions if you’re going to say anything. That’s the dilemma facing Sister Aloysius,…

Ten Filmmakers Fight it Out

You hold the fate of an aspiring filmmaker in your hands. The Manhattan Short Film Festival is screening in 173 cities across the world this week and Mos’Art Theater (700 Park Ave., Lake Park) is the only place in South Florida you can catch it. In addition to voting on…

Forbidden Fruit

Show of hands — How many of you can name the last African American lesbian feature film you saw at the Muvico? Anyone? It’s a sad state of cinema when predictable “dick flicks” like You Don’t Mess With the Zohan rake in big bucks while smart, engaging films on race,…

The Fish Get Busy

For all the ups and downs of the 2009 Florida Marlins season, there has been one constant. No, not the terrible relief pitching but, rather, the ability to beat the bejesus out of their NL East rival New York Mets at every given chance. The Marlins enter this weekend with…

Lights On, Nobody Home

In the early 1960s, George Segal began producing the sculptures on which he built his reputation: life-sized plaster casts of the human figure, sometimes alone, often in pairs or groups, usually in public places that he re-created using found objects. There are 13 such sculptures in “George Segal: Street Scenes,”…

MasterMind Awards — Meet the Judges

New Times is excited to announce that we’re giving away $1,000 apiece to four local artists as part of our newly established Master­Mind Awards. Individuals can enter a variety of media — performance art, video/film/multimedia, visual art, fashion design — or nominate someone whose work they admire. Winners will be…

The Informant! Gets Cute With Massive Corporate Scandal and Blows the Story

As evidenced by The Informant!, it’s a hell of a tricky thing turning real-life pulp into floss sugar. The story of Archer Daniels Midland biochemist-exec-turned-crooked-federal-snitch Mark Whitacre is a tragicomedy. Journalist Kurt Eichenwald spent five years trailing the bipolar fuckup, and his 2000 book, The Informant, is so densely, richly…

Soul Man

Sophie Barthes’ clever metaphysical comedy Cold Souls has been dubbed Being Paul Giamatti more than once since its Sundance 2009 debut. But if comparisons to Being John Malkovich and the other films of Charlie Kaufman are inevitable, the similarities go only so far. Sure, Paul Giamatti plays “Paul Giamatti,” another…