Chuck Malkus really wants you to hate Scott Rothstein. Describing the disgraced and hilariously ostentatious Rothstein, Malkus uses phrases like “orgy of fraud” and “one big rotting tapestry” and — our favorite — the “Pandora’s Box that is Scott’s brain.” Malkus’ book about Rothstein, Ultimate Ponzi, was released last week…
At some point, a Carol City-bred corrections officers named William Leonard Roberts II stepped inside a phone booth and popped out as Rick Ross, a slow-jawing hip-hop He-Man. Although the Bawse preaches a drug-slinging, drive-by braggadocio, the gangster lifestyle — as the media and haters have been quick to point…
If you haven’t heard yet, there’s a massive blizzard storm weather event snow thing that’s about to engulf the northeastern part of the U.S. The Weather Channel has nicknamed the menacing storm Nemo, for some reason. In any event, thanks to Nemo, Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International Airport has announced a crapload…
Michael Seacrest got into an argument with Adrijon Hoti in the early morning hours on Thursday. Apparently Hoti was angry at Seacrest for taking a jacket that wasn’t his. A heated argument ensued, and Hoti stepped up to Seacrest and allegedly made verbal threats. Seacrest didn’t like a dude being…
According to Boca Raton police, at least one person has been shot at Florida Atlantic University’s Boca campus. The shooting reportedly happened on the roof of one of the buildings, but police have yet to confirm that. This is a developing story…. Update [1:00 p.m.]: Police have confirmed that FAU…
For a long while now this season, the Miami Heat were languishing at the bottom of the league in rebounds. This was partly due to them not having a real rebounding specialist. It was also because the Heat sometimes approach regular season games like a kid playing with his mashed…
Having a baby is many things: wonderful, scary, exuberant, life-affirming, and life-changing. Rick Scott wants to add “creepy as shit” to that list. Governor Voldemort has teamed up with Hallmark and several local hospitals to send cards to new moms with greetings, congratulations, and immunization advice. Scott insists that this isn’t…
South Florida has no shortage of pornography, being right down there with California’s San Fernando Valley as a center for the porn film and video industry, and with a full palette of related activities on the side: titty bars, escort services, you name it.But as to the pornography of everyday…
The local personalities, egos, and public figures who swung through the news cycle this week, ranked by New Times’ crack research department using a highly scientific algorithm (i.e., taking the square root of the Sun Life Stadium upgrade price tag . . . err . . . which button is…
Bayli Silberstein wanted to start a Gay-Straight Alliance Club at her school, Carver Middle School in Leesburg, Florida. Basically the 14-year-old wanted to create a school club where her friends who had been “bullied for their sexual orientation”could have a place to talk about such things, and generally hang out…
And so, this is how the Loki Boy saga — which has captivated Floridians, New Yorkers and Londoners for weeks — will end. With a whimper. An empty mansion, some personal possessions strewn about, and Bank Of America has won AGAIN. Three cheers for America! Yesterday at 1:30 p.m., police…
Sean G took a young lady he met on Tagged out on a date. The two went out and presumably had a lovely time together. At the end of the night, Sean G drove his date to her house, before driving home, like a true gentleman. But not before he allegedly…
Authorities seized a boat Thursday morning reportedly stolen from Broward County that apparently had a huge shipment of drugs. A boatload of drugs, if you will (sorry). Law enforcement sources are saying that about 1,000 pounds of drugs were seized…
It appears the Alex-Collins-Mother-Absconded-With-His Letter-of-Intent-gate is far from over. Just this morning, we told you how the South Plantation High star running back recruit said he’s still going to sign with Arkansas, even after his mom ran off with his letter of intent Wednesday. See also: -Mother of Alex Collins,…
Calvin Butler is in Palm Beach County Jail on a $100,000 bond, after being arrested Tuesday night and charged with practicing medicine without a license. The medicine Butler practiced?Injecting silicone into patients’ asses in a West Palm Beach motel and closing the wounds with Krazy Glue. Because, what could possibly…
Yesterday we told you about South Plantation High star running back Alex Collins’ mom confiscating his letter of intent to attend Arkansas and then disappearing with it. Basically, Momma Collins doesn’t want her baby to go so far away. And who can blame her? It’s her son; it’s a tense…
What’s better than a beer, a burger, and some very large boobs? Hallandale Beach and Weston would say, “Nothing. Nothing is what’s better than those things.” Because, as it turns out, both cities are planning to open new breastaurants in the coming months because titties is awesome! Hallandale Beach will…
So like we were totally in traffic court the other day and who comes up as the presiding robe on my docket but ugh omg Judge Sanders — right, the same creep-o who was jamming up my Facebook page with friend requests last spring break. I know, totally f-king awkward,…
This week, New Times reported on the electronic cigarette business, which is currently booming but faces a crossroads this April, when the Food and Drug Administration is set to release proposals on how it will regulate the industry. A Wells Fargo analyst who studies the tobacco industry told us that…
Like a little kid showing off her new toys, Donna Queen, a 50-year-old housewife from Coral Springs, giddily opens a black pouch and reveals her quiver of electronic cigarettes. One is covered in pink rhinestones that glitter like a disco ball. Another is decorated with a purple flower pattern. She…
Charlie Sheen lives in a big, yellow house on a T-shaped intersection in the middle of a fake neighborhood in a gated community off Mulholland Drive in Los Angeles. When I arrive there on a Saturday afternoon in January, I am intercepted in Sheen’s driveway by a security guard, a…
Looks like next week’s State of the Union address response by the GOPers is gonna be a little more charisma-y than what everybody’s used to. Republicans have announced that Charisma Boy! himself, President Sen. Marco Rubio, will be delivering their response to President Barack Obama’s State of the Union address…
