Everybody’s Kung Food Fighting

We used to joke about serving a “knuckle sandwich” and washing it down with a cool “can of whoop-ass” (pictured above). But no more. Not since this rash of cuisine-related crime struck Florida. This past week, we’ve been too scared to enter a Dunkin’ Donuts, and only now that our…

Toni Morrison doppelganger nabbed

One of the ladies above is a Nobel Prize-winning novelist. The other was recently arrested in Broward County for contempt of court. Adding to the weirdness, the Browardian is named Zulma Coris, which sounds a bit like a character in a Morrison novel.– Thomas Francis…

We Got the Donut Bandits!!

No, not him. These guys. Sheriff Al, give us our money quote!”These guys weren’t upset because they couldn’t pay their rent or their 401K tanked,” Lamberti said. “These are just cold-blooded thugs. One suspect said he just wanted to ‘up’ his body count.”Sorry, but boy scouts who want their “cold-blooded…

Battle Of The Herald (Sports) Hacks

Dan La Batard had the audacity yesterday to infer in his Miami Herald column that erstwhile Heat coach Pat Riley dumps his team when it’s losing and jumps back on when its rising (and Shaq is back on the court). Here’s a taste: “Anybody else with less aura and less…

Every Damn Time

Mad Dog Merkel The Sun-Sentinel is such a trembling leaf of a newspaper it’s surprising it hasn’t floated to the ground and started to decompose. Once again, it sided with keeping its readers in the dark over reporting the details of a news story. This time it happened in a…

Gangs and Politics

Gotta check out this story in the Palm Beach Post by Stephanie Slater and Dianna Smith about a deadly war going on between two Haitian gangs. It all stems, apparently, from a small-time music label called Top 6 Records. The B-Town Boys, one of the groups involved in Top 6,…

Weekend Walkup

— Ralph De La Cruz impressed the hell out of me this weekend. Check out this courageous little column. — The story by Thomas R. Collins and Tony Doris on West Palm Commissioner Jim Exline’s conflict of interest shows that Palm Beach Post is still, pound-for-pound, the best watchdog of…

Morning Rundown

“John Doe” Leader Smith It may have taken the recent spate of senseless killings to awaken the ancient art of deadline murder reporting in South Florida. The Miami Herald’s David Ovalle, Nicholas Spangler and Evan S. Benn give a veritable tutorial on the craft in this morning’s newspaper. They tell…

Herald Breaks Traffic Story; World Misses Significance

— The Miami Herald’s Web team pulled off another gem this morning. Headline: “Early morning driving is difficult because of traffic woes – 7/18/2006 08:27 AM EDT” Read this thing. Is the Herald serious about posting traffic reports in the morning at 8:30 a.m., when most people are already on…

In The News

Miami Herald crime writer Wanda DeMarzo tells us today about a “stunning” plea deal: The State Attorney’s Office is dropping charges against Deputy Chris Thieman in the crime-reporting scandal in exchange for Thieman’s testimony against higher-ups. Yeah, I suppose it’s stunning. It also proves — again — that Michael Satz…

Sweet Home Broward County

In the latest twist from the Larry Deetjen Racist Airport Blowup saga, an unexpected object was found while city employees cleaned out the suspended city manager’s office: A Confederate flag. The flag was found rolled up on a shelf in his office. Whatever the reason for it, I think it’s…

You Have The Right To Remain Absolutely Fabulous

In the Miami Herald, Darran Simon had a wonderful story about a Sunrise cop who gave a Christian conservative group a good ol’ fashioned hassle. The Florida Family Policy Council, led by the vile James Dobson, claims Sgt. Stephen Allen harassed them during a drive for signatures to support a…

Judge Michael Gates Is A Boot-Licking Idiot

Some quick (and not so quick) takes on the morning papers: Wanda DeMarzo tells us of the outrageous ruling by Circuit Judge Michael Gates in the trial of former BSO deputy Christian Zapata, the first public hearing of the crime stats scandal. Gates — remember that name — ruled that…

I Want To Be An Internet Feeder When I Grow Up

While Miami Herald Editor Tom Fiedler has been relentlessly preaching the wonders of newspapers’ convergence onto radio, TV, and, most importantly, the Internet, the Palm Beach Post got the attention this week. Editor & Publisher’s Steve Outing wrote about the Post’s web-feedin’, bloggin’, multi-taskin’ reporters in his recent column. He…

The Edna Buchanan Effect?

I don’t know what’s in the water (or the estrogen) around here, but in South Florida right now a handful of journalistas are lighting up the newspapers in the crime-writing department. From the Herald you have this generation’s grande dame of the genre, Wanda DeMarzo. She’s relentless, has the best…

It’s Hard to Be A Pimp (Really)

So you’ve probably seen the tempest in a teapot with Tom Fiedler. If not, read the comments in the post below. I’m going to do a little bit more reporting on this, but until then, let’s move on to … The DBR Beating a Subpoena Broward Circuit Judge Marc Gold…

Kevin Underwood’s Life In Hell

The blending of shoe marketing and sports reporting was on display Sunday. Dominating the front page of both the Sun-Sentinel and the Palm Beach Post were feature stories about the same thing: The Heat’s Dwyane Wade’s penchant for falling down on the court. It might seem like a weird coincidence…

When The Press Notifies The Kin

Boca Crime Scene/Sun-Sentinel Photo While reporting on the killing of a married couple at a Boca Raton clothing store, Sentinel reporter Leon Fooksman contacted family members in Alabama. For crime reporters, contacting people after they’ve heard devastating news about their loved ones is business as usual. But what happened to…

Will Feds Investigate Michael Satz, Too?

Let’s see. Leon Fooksman and Chrystian Tejedor start us on a murder mystery in Boca Raton. Lisa Huriash stirs up a nest of envy in Sentinel readers, what economist Thorsten Veblen called pecuniary emulation. We know some people demand 40-foot swimming pools, theaters, billiard rooms, full-court basketball courts and such…

Knotty Head Bandits

A year or so ago, they were probably just a bunch of punk car thieves. It was a night in September 2003, and a group of them — friends, most of them teenagers — were hanging out in a Wal-Mart in Royal Palm Beach looking for a car to steal…