Which "Famous" Chef Wrote This Crazy Craigslist Post?

We were cruising Craigslist this morning (for "friendship," we swear) and stumbled across this mighty odd post from a supposedly famous chef in need of an attorney (preferably female). Any guesses on this person's identity?

Lawyer Needed for Public Figure:

I was told I'm supposed to be a famous chef.

People are placing too much ownership on me and I'm getting tossed around like a deck of cards.

Is this real? I don't know. That's why I'm writing for help.

Need help communicating with veteran performers, who are telling me this information, to get the story straight.

Communication is very poor. There also seems to be a tug-o-war going on

as to "who owns me" and other people, that know me, are making decisions

for, or about, me without authorization from myself. 

Not much income is being made, yet, due to a political mess.

Looking to barter/exchange 6 months legal services for your 6 months

exposure of your logo on my bag and cold weather jacket. (Willing to

negotiate on terms. ) Please don't reply if you can't barter. Don't have

the money right now but definitely have an interesting situation.

(Looked into entrtnmnt lawyers in Miami and they wanted 10k up front.) 

Honestly, I don't have much to offer you right now except

exposure to the people from the ent. industry and the public.

This situation can't seem to get out of the beginning stages because I

do not have a personal advocate and the people that I thought would be

by my side either: 
1. didn't think this situation was credible 
2. the veteran performers weren't credible or 
3. they took the information I told them -- ran off with it -- and

started networking in the industry to further their own agenda -- leaving

me in the dust. 

The situation is complicated. Looking for someone to be by my

side who is not going to exploit me or pressure me into doing something I

don't want to do. People are seeming to take on the behavior of a TMZ

employee when the cameras are around. 

Need an advocate to make

sure I get paid appropriately and that my privacy rights are exercised.

Would like to negotiate for future growth after 6 month barter/exchange

agreement and things progress.

Please send your website link and/or resume, contact info and any

information that may be helpful in helping me choose the right attorney

for the situation. 

Please reply to: [email protected] 

Female attorney preferred - between North Miami & South Palm Beach County