Thank goodness for Barbara Hijek -- a woman whose job is to keep us all abreast of "weird, wacky, strange news from the Sunshine State." Sometimes she tries to make light of things that are unmakelightofable, but sometimes she finds a little gem of a story without which, you realize moments after reading it, your life would be just a little less awesome.
This is one of those stories. Lookit that guy on the left! Lookitum! Have you ever seen a happier mug?
Why's he grinning? Because he's just done something hilarious. On the occasion of his 64th birthday, according to Hijek, this guy -- his name's Jack Snyder -- sauntered on over to San Miguel Drive and Chantilly Lane in Port Richie. He depantsed himself and waggled his weenus at a bus full of schoolchildren.
According to Erin Sullivan of the St. Petersburg Times,
who broke the story (if this is the kind of story that can be said to
have "broken," which seems debatable), Jack Snyder didn't run away from
the scene. He was still kicking around when the cops responded to a
grandma's complaints. He explained to the arresting officer that he
thought his flashing would be "funny." Which it was! Which is why Hijek
wrote about it!
Except -- you know what's not funny? Jack
Snyder's homeless. And he only recently got out of jail for assorted
petty crimes. And he's almost certainly deranged. And we're laughing at
him anyway. Now he's back in jail, being held on a $50,000 bond, and
he'll probably get out eventually. And then he'll probably misbehave again, and
maybe he'll do so in some witty and creative way -- flashing! -- that
makes us giggle. Then he'll end up back in the slammer. And
so on. Haha?
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