Bill Parcells, the Dolphins' executive vice president of football operations, is "not worth a shit." At least that's what his former boss, Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, was caught slurring on a shaky phone camera in video originally posted by Deadspin.
The conversation starts when an unidentified man asks Jones -- seated at a bar with the top of his shirt unbuttoned -- about Florida's Patron Saint of Life, Tim Tebow.
The man asks Jones if he would draft Tebow just to sell tickets.
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to New Times Broward-Palm Beach's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling South Florida's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
"That's the only reason I brought in Bill Parcells," Jones says to an audience of laughter.
"Bill's not worth a shit. I love him," Jones continues. "Not worth a shit, but I wanted -- they were on my ass so bad. J's gotta have a yes man. So to get this fuckin' stadium, I need to bring his ass in."
Of course, in his time in Dallas, Parcells completely turned around the franchise and made the playoffs for the first time in nearly a decade. He also found Tony Romo, an undrafted rookie who has been the starting quarterback in Dallas for five seasons.
Oh, and once he came to Florida, Parcells also took the 1-15 Dolphins to the playoffs in one year, the single best turnaround in league history. Impressive. Or as Jerry Jones would say, "not worth a shit."