The Miami Dolphins are set to sign Detroit Lions free agent Ndamukong Suh as early as today. Reports say the Fins are going to give Suh the biggest contract for a defensive lineman in NFL history: a whopping $114 million, with $60 million of it guaranteed.
The deal is so big that rumors have begun to swirl about NFL owners being miffed at Dolphins owner Stephen Ross for giving such a hefty contract to a non-skills position players. But for all his foibles, Ross has never been shy about aggressively going after what he wants.
Suh is a great player who will make an immediate impact on the defense. But because these are the Dolphins and because their recent history has been abysmal, this whole thing could very well backfire. Any number of things can go wrong. Suh can suddenly decide to suck. He could get hurt. His contract could get in the way of getting other quality players. Sun Life Stadium can fall into a sinkhole. Because, Dolphins.
So, to stay grounded and as a reminder that Dolphins are gonna Dolphins, here's a list of their worst all-time free agent signings.
5. Joey Porter: Aww yeah. Popcorn Muscles himself. In 2007, the Dolphins signed Porter away from the Steelers, giving him a whopping five-year, $32 million deal. Now while Porter had some good games here and there, including a 17-sack season, he never became the monster he was in Pittsburgh and certainly never earned the big contract Miami gave him. On top of all that, Porter seemed to get in trouble on a constant basis and was once suspended by the team for "undisclosed reasons." The worst season of his career came with Miami when, in 2007, he recorded only 5.5 sacks.
4. Ernest Wilford: Remember this guy? Wilford should have been the first sign that Bill Parcells is a major fraud and that his reputation as a Football Genius was built mainly because he was ornery and won a couple of Super Bowls with a Giants team that he didn't actually build. The Dolphins gave Wilford a four-year, $13 million deal, with a $6 signing bonus. He was big, and he was a tight end. And apparently, that was enough for Parcells to give him a fat contract. Wilford's career stats as a Dolphin? Seven games, three catches for a grand total of 25 yards.
3. Damion McIntosh: Ahhh, the Siren Song of the big left tackle that can cure all your woes. It's tough to resist. And in 2004, the Dolphins were sucked into that vortex, giving McIntosh a ridiculous six-year, $23 million deal based on an OK four seasons with San Diego. Apparently, the Dolphins saw in McIntosh a franchise left tackle. What they got in return was a a guy who ended his career bouncing from team to team. With the Dolphins, McIntosh lasted only three seasons before the team outright cut him. Hardly the franchise blindside guy they thought they were getting when they handed him all that money. He ended his career playing for the Chargers, Dolphins, Chiefs, and Seahawks before calling it a career.
2. Gibril Wilson: Another Parcells gem, Wilson was given a five-year, $27.5 million deal in 2009 by the Football Super Genius all so he could become one of the all-time most loathed players in Dolphins fans' history. Why? Because he was on the Giants 2007 Super Bowl winning team. And, yeah, that's pretty much it. Wilson was barely a professional football player, lasting one season with the Dolphins and amassing exactly zero interceptions, zero fumble recoveries, and one sack. He was constantly burned, constantly outmuscled, and constantly looked like a guy who swore he had misplaced his sunglasses while they were on top of his head the whole time.
1. Jake Grove: Yup. Yet another Parcells guy. Yet another fat guy the Dolphins fell in love with and thought would fix their O-line issues. Grove certainly looked like an offensive player. He was a six-foot-four, 300-pound behemoth. He ended being a two-ton turd. And the Dolphins should have probably known this, seeing how Grove's entire career with the Oakland Raiders was littered with injuries and so-so play. But, hey, Parcells! So the Dolphins went ahead and gave Grove a four-year, $28 million deal to be their center. And it was an unmitigated disaster. Grove SHOCKINGLY spent most of his time in Miami injured. After one season, Grove was cut and has now become part of NFL lore as one of the 20 all-time worst free agent signings ever.