Tuesday night, CNN aired a Trump Family Town Hall special, a sit-down interview/family reunion featuring Anderson Cooper speaking with Donald Trump; his wife, Melania; sons Eric and Donald Jr.; daughter Ivanka; grandchildren; and pretty much every available other
As far as Trump interviews go, it was a tame hour-plus. But there was one more member of the Trump family that had everyone talking. Most of the talking included asking, "Wait, who is hell is that?"
That someone was 22-year-old Tiffany Trump, Donald's only daughter from his 1993-99 marriage to his second wife, Marla Maples.
The youngest Trump daughter, most widely known for her rich-kid Instagram page, spoke mostly of how much she adored her father and how he has motivated her as she attends the University of Pennslyvania's Wharton School of Business.
"He just makes me want to continue to work harder and improve myself and keep on pushing to my limit," she said. "I just truly feel that my father is the best father, the best husband he could be."
What Tiffany Trump didn't talk about was that she once released an electronic pop song. The track, titled "Like a Bird," barely exists on the internet in the year 2016, oh, but it's there. Currently ranked as Amazon Prime's 385,887th most popular download, the song features guest appearances by artists named "Sprite" and "Logic."
“I love music,” Trump told Oprah, on an episode of Winfrey’s show from several years back. “It’s always been very dear to me. It’s a big passion. It’s more of a hobby right now, but we’ll see in a couple of years if I want to take it to the next level as a professional.”
Yeah, about that. We know the answer to that question now.
While there is no video of the song, you can listen to a snippet here (then buy it for 99 cents and own it, if you so desire) by scrolling down and clicking "sample this song." Or you can just take our word for it and imagine someone Snapchatting you in an Auto-Tuned voice.
"Like a Bird" plays like something a couple of high school friends made on an iPhone app, then uploaded to YouTube to regret forever. Here are some of the lyrics:
I see you like that spot above
Crawling through the liquid love
You're cute and you're tweeting me!
Obsessing over crazy things
I just want serenity
While living it up!
Damn, really makes you think. At one point in the song, Trump describes her surroundings, telling you about the "diamonds that be shimmering." She's not wrong, diamonds do be shimmering.
Reviews on Amazon and iTunes vary widely, from oddly positive to downright mean. One iTunes reviewer, however, actually seemed to want to help.
It's entirely possible Tiffany Trump read this review and knew her music career was over. There doesn't seem to be a trace of any other music she has released. Tiffany has wisely moved on, will graduate soon, and will undoubtedly land a seven-figure job in no time.
Maybe one day Tiffany will release another electronic-pop masterpiece, but today is not that day.