Andy Samberg, the star of arguably the best movie ever made, Hot Rod, is turning 33 today. As the leader of comedy/music group the Lonely Island, Samberg's risen to the top of the charts while singing about creamed jeans, mermaid sex, and letting everyone know that he just had sex. It's his work on Saturday Night Live that everyone talks about on Monday morning as they stir their coffee and dread the work week.
How can we honor a man who's given us so much? What do you give the guy who has everything? Nothing. He doesn't need a damn thing. He's set. But, we want something from him. We want to be his friend. We want to punch dance our rage with him in wooded glen. We wanna go to fancy nightclubs, drink that Ciroc Diddy shit with him and be really shy when the ladies approach us. We'd settle for just giving him a ride to the airport, because that's what friends do. Man, we'd be happy with just standing next to him and admiring his glorious mountain-face in our periphery.