The Carrie Underwood poster that hangs above our bed isn't there only because New Times is a sucker for pop country tunes about digging your keys into a cheating lover's "pretty little souped-up four-wheel drive" and then slashing said pickup's tires after going all Gary Sheffield on the headlights. The American Country Awards' Female Artist of the Year is also hanging 'round the bedroom for our health, because waking up and staring into Underwood's gorgeous brown eyes each morning reminds us that vegetarianism is sexy as hell. "I'm 95 percent vegan," Underwood recently said in an interview with Self. "I'll never eat meat again, because I look and feel better without it." Damn right, Carrie! We live in America, dammit! We shouldn't rely on such genetically modified excuse-for-a-cow crap when hunger strikes! "In my perfect world," Underwood added, "I'd have web cams wherever food is processed so I'd know how clean it is." Amen, sister. We'll have what she's having.We'll have what Carrie is having.