There is an infinite number of ways to celebrate this fine country on the Fourth of July.
Drag shows, twerking contests, pool party day raves? If these don't immediately call to mind the Land of the Free, well, you're simply un-American. As far as we're concerned, as long as red, white, and blue are involved in any way, you've got a party that stands for freedom, patriotism, and hot dogs.
Here are the top five fiestas in Fort Lauderdale and West Palm Beach where you can do what Americans do best this July Fourth: drink and watch fireworks. God bless America.
Flaunt's Annual Redneck Rumble 'Murrica Edition
9 p.m. Thursday, July 4, at Respectable Street, 518 Clematis St., West Palm Beach. Free. Visit sub-culture.org/respectable-street.
West Palm's original indie-electro dance party, Flaunt, hosts its annual Redneck Rumble this Thursday, adding an extra-special 'Murrica spin to celebrate the holiday. Two-dollar American-made Pabst Blue Ribbons and $3 Flaunt shots will keep the cutoffs-sportin', mud-puddle-jumpin', popsicle-lickin', down-home-hipsters happy all night long. There will be American spirit. There will be smoking of American Spirits. There will be dancing and probably some beer-can crushing. Shoot, sounds like one helluva good rumble to us!
Lulu's Bait Shack
2 p.m. Thursday, July 4, at Lulu's Bait Shack, 17 S. Atlantic Blvd., Fort Lauderdale. Free. Visit lulusbaitshack.com.
Head up the stairs at Fort Lauderdale Beach Place for a Cajun-style Independence Day celebration at Lulu's Bait Shack. You can chill out on the breezy second-story porch to live music by Grindstone and Rough Shot, ogle the straight-sexy bikini contest, and pass out to the majestic Fort Lauderdale Beach fireworks show at dusk. Aside from hot bods, Lulu's is also serving ice-cold, one-buck draft beers and $15 aluminum bottle buckets of Bud and Bud Light all night. Festivities begin at 2 p.m., so settle in for the day and patriotically participate in all of that beachfront revelry.
Miss Independence 2013
9 p.m. Thursday, July 4, at Capone's, 310 Himmarshee St., Fort Lauderdale. Free. Visit caponesnightclub.com.
Thursday, head down to Fort Lauderdale's unofficial twerking HQ to celebrate freedom at the "Miss Independence 2013" competition at Capone's. We're not quite sure exactly what the terms of the competition are or who's judging, but based on prior Capone's experiences, we feel confident you can expect sexy, big-bootied ladies shaking it atop the bars for "big cash and prizes." Making it rain has become today's Great American Pastime, and we don't know about you, but we like it when a gal exercises her American right to ass-clap. Capone's, we salute your festive spirit.
Party Nation IndepenDANCE Party
Noon, Thursday, July 4, at Exit 66, 219 S. Fort Lauderdale Beach Blvd., Fort Lauderdale. Admission costs $15. Visit exit66fl.com.
Exit 66, the massive dance club and pool party hub behind Fort Lauderdale Beach's Rock Bar, gets the party started early this Independence Day with a massive indoor/outdoor mini music festival featuring more than 25 of the area's best DJs spinning EDM of all sorts. Free tickets were already snagged, but a mere $15 gets you access to all that bass, plus barbecue, poolside sunning, and terrace access to view the fireworks show over the ocean at nightfall. Doors open at noon, and star-spangled swim attire is recommended.
Lady Bunny Live
10 p.m. Thursday, July 4, at Village Pub, 2283 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors. Free. Visit villagepubwm.com.
Drag queen, DJ, comedian, freelance journalist, Wigstock organizer, and judge on RuPaul's Drag U, Lady Bunny will perform live Thursday at the Village Pub in Wilton Manors. Apart from an all-day happy hour with two-for-one drinks until 9 p.m., partygoers can enjoy $5 Absolut cocktails until close. Cheap drink deals and celebrity drag thrills? We vote yes!