Chrome Dick on the Future of Noise: "Maybe Rat Bastard Will Wear Sandals" | County Grind | South Florida | Broward Palm Beach New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Broward-Palm Beach, Florida

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Chrome Dick on the Future of Noise: "Maybe Rat Bastard Will Wear Sandals"

With a stage name like Chrome Dick, one might expect noise dude Raphael Alvarez to be sporting leather pants, thick links of chain, and a black skintight gimp-mask with a zipper through which he may dangle his bright pink freak-a-leak tongue.

But even when he is surfing eye-watering shrieks of feedback, or lounging in a bubbling cauldron of wall noise, one can't resist the chronic urge to ask the soft spoken, amiable, perpetually-supportive Alvarez for an extended hug.

And that makes the forcefulness of his output that much more stated.

As part of our interview series with Broward and Palm Beach County artists performing at the 10th anniversary of Rat Bastard's International Noise Conference, we knew we had to check in with one of the nicest guys we know that makes some straight up naaasty sounds.



New Times: Have you ever considered changing the name of your band to Chrome Adorable Teddy Bear? Or maybe Cuddly Dick?


Raphael Alexis Alvarez: I like the first one. That'll be my alter ego for my children's song series.

You play in a few other straightforward rock projects. Do your bandmates think the noise shit is weird?


I play in Suede Dudes and Möthersky. The Dudes support what I do to the fullest and have since incorporated a bit of it in some of our songs. They've grown to appreciate the noise shit which makes me a happy Chrome Bear. Richard Vergez, the head honcho behind Möthersky, performs ambient noise in Drowning The Virgin Silence. "Weird" is his middle name. Kelvin, or Número Dos, is also a bit of a nutter.



Your Facebook says you know British English. Are you just joshing?

Don't be a bloody wanker, Matt. Are you takin' a piss?

Describe a time in which you experienced physical pain as a result of the very sounds you were generating.


It was when I teamed up with David "Dub" Smith as Chrome Rauh for a show at the end/SPRING BREAK when they were in the old Locust Projects space. I was a couple feet away from my amp. I duct taped a contact mic that ran through some pedals on to a metal pipe and was banging it around on the concrete floor. It created this piercing frequency that, combined with Dub's harsh noise, killed my ears. That night was the beginning of my hearing's deterioration.



Will noise ever sell out (again)? Will there be a new wave that considers Wolf Eyes some kind of ur-text?


Are Wolf Eyes the Led Zeppelin of noise now? I hope so. Us noise people need the exposure and money to continue spending it all at Churchill's. Maybe we can save up enough to buy the Snooze Theatre and open it back up for life. I'd like Kenny Millions to be a household name. Maybe he can start up his own porn production company. Maybe Rat Bastard will wear sandals. The future is bright my friend. Thank you.



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Matt Preira

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