Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade is an instantly recognizable train wreck, heralding the coming end of year festivities. As usual, we do not like to single out religious celebrations in lieu of having to list them all and possibly offend those we might accidentally leave out, so we'll err on the side of Seinfeld and assume Festivus really is for all of us.
Regardless of which, the parade proper is fun for the family and features iconic and beloved characters in a helium-inflated format, because nothing says "good time" like balloons and floats filled with artists lip-synching their amazing hits!
This year's Parade features artists we dig like Flo Rida and Chris Isaak (who are certainly great pals in real life) as well as Jimmy Fallon and the Roots (we had no idea he pulled a Diana Ross on them cats), the Wanted, Karmin, Neon Trees, and Carly Rae Jepsen, among many others.
We, of course, would prefer to see a heavier Floridian representation within the proceedings, and thus offer the following stand-in choices.
5. Otto Von Schirach - "When Dinosaurs Rule the Earth"
Otto's one of our more intricately bizarre neighbors and his family-friendly fare would sit great on an elaborate float with his merry pranksters in full gear and giant dinosaur balloons colliding with those Sandy-compromised buildings. Pan con lechon for everybody!