It's been one hell of a Halloween season, zombie dance parties, zombie walks, fetish fashion shows, and the vampire ball kept us all quite busy. But despite this exhausting -- in a good way, of course -- amount of events, not even the rain could keep Fort Lauderdale from celebrating over the official Halloweekend.
The whirlwind of a weekend kicked off on Friday night at Laser Wolf. And what appeared to be just another night of downing craft beers on a packed dance floor turned out to be so much more.
It was a dismal rainy night, and not the kind of drizzling rain that doesn't faze us native Floridians; it was a fucking on-and-off monsoon. But that didn't stop the entire Fort Lauderdale neighborhood from packing into Laser Wolf like sardines in a can.
The Bellus brothers were behind the bar and their Run D.M.C. costumes complemented the old-school hip-hop
records the DJ was pumping out. It was hard to tell if the crowd was
dancing or just trying to find a comfortable standing position among
all the damp bodies. Each time the rain appeared to slow down, the crowd rushed for the doors like the running of the bulls to grab a smoke or
some fresh air. Surrounded by a group of friends was a girl in a full-blown Leeloo Dallas getup, leaving nothing to the imagination. A stumbling fellow with his shirt off patted himself with paper towels and appeared to be having an intense conversation at someone.
The music went off. A smoke machine came on.
Check. Check," shouted a voice over the speakers.
room stopped what they were doing, and turned to the bar where a
commotion was brewing behind the wooden doors. Like a bat out of hell,
hometown hip hop heroes Bleubird and Protoman hopped on the bar, while DJ Sensitive Side stayed below to provide the music. Standing a good twelve feet in the air, the duo commanded the room's attention toward them as they performed a few tracks. Girls were screaming, bras were flying, and bottles were poppin'. Ok maybe not. But, the energy in the room sure as hell made it feel like it. As
quick as they rode in was as quick as they disappeared, leaving the crowd yearning for more.
Stepping outside for a breather, I noticed a gang of females approaching the bar. Out of the
darkness appeared three busty blondes decked out in Super Mario Brothers costumes, the sexy version. They sauntered up the concrete pathway arm in arm, stopping to
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take photos with some guys leaning against the wall. This was my cue to call it a night.
Friday's weather was bad, but Saturday's weather was almost unbearable. But like they say, the show must go on, and that it most certainly did. The first stop on the night's agenda was to check out Swarm 666, an enormous warehouse party fueled by the efforts of the Black Locust society. After driving through a flooded dark neighborhood, we finally stepped onto the scene. Outside groups of damp costumed party-hoppers huddled closely against one another under umbrellas trying to avoid the rain. Indoors, the enormous graffiti adorned space was filled to the brim with folks downing drinks and bopping their heads to the music.
Unfortunately my tolerance for getting rained on isn't very high, so I decided to head downtown to Green Room's "Slaughter on 2nd" event.
Every year the downtown Himmarshee strip is shut down for its massive Halloween blowout. Flocks of girls costumed in skimpy outfits swarm the bars and clubs, making all the boys drool. But this year was different. Not sure if it was the rain or because October was so jam packed with events, but the strip was a ghost town -- except for the Green Room. The two-story venue became a haven for costumed scenesters trying to escape the treacherous rain.
Upon entering, the door folk reminded us to check out the haunted house upstairs. Sorry sir, but that is something I will not be adding to my to-do list. However, my accomplices felt otherwise and disappeared down a dark hallway.
In a corner, a girl dressed as Snooki -- complete with fake padded hips -- danced against the railing while her Flashdance pants-less friend attempted the film's signature dance move over and over. Sashaying around a group of boys was a tall thin body in a red mini dress so short that ass cheeks were showing. Turning around the scantily dressed person decided to give some folks a show. And what a show it was. Reveling that she was actually a he and had the goods to prove it. Creeping around the venue was a guy dressed as Buckethead. Forget
zombies and serial killers, this was hands down the creepiest costume of
the night. He'd approach your group and just stare at you with the masked blank expression. It's basically what nightmares are made of.
Returning back from the haunted house my friends reassured me that it was better I didn't go along. Although it was a quick walk through, it was frightening. Strobe lights and people jumping out, no thank you.
In the middle of the dance floor was someone dressed as a robot. But this was not your basic robot costume. It was completely made out of cardboard boxes and lights. It was pretty impressive, especially in comparison to the overdone pop culture costumes. There is no need for that many Black Swan costumes, ten to be exact. Surprisingly, the number of Amy Winehouse costumes was pretty low, I did spot a man with a hairy chest dressed as her. Silly string flew through the air getting stuck in people's wigs. Every now and then the in house burlesque troupe, Reckless Dames, took the stage to entertain the audience with Halloween themed performances. A half naked zombie girl weaved through the masses with a tray of neon
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test tube shots while a tiny Wednesday Addams was being carried over the shoulder of her Pugsley Addams partner.
By 3:00am, the crowd was still growing and showing no sign of exhaustion. However, I was. It was time to bid farewell to Halloween and climb into a cab back to realitytown.